Buttons Everywhere!
by Jesagon
Summary: Harry changes everything when he enters the magical world, pieces from his life and those around him during his years at Hogwarts. And the buttons? They're magical, and they are everywhere.
1. Chapter 1

I do not own, so therefore I can not earn. Meaning - don't pay to read this, and don't sue me!

To the story...

_The day the Wizarding World realized the stupidity of self-destruction buttons._

Eleven year old Harry Potter was looking around him confused. His ticket read platform 9 ¾, but for all his frantic searching he could not find it. He had asked an old man with a paper if he knew, but the man had only laughed and mumbled about kids these days.

_Hagrid hadn't said anything about this_, Harry thought to himself, feeling just a bit betrayed. _In fact, he hardly told me anything. _He looked at a big round clock at the wall, it read 10:38 and Harry realized that he had been looking for an entrance to the platform for more than an hour. _So much for making good time... _

Suddenly though, Harry spotted a family of red-heads. He could not hear what they said over the noise in the train station, but if the owl they carried was any indication these people would know the way forward. Harry hurried to catch up to them. Just then a train pulled in though, and people started walking everywhere. He missed them, but might have seen some strains of red hair disappearing in a wall.

He walked to the wall to investigate, and found that if he pushed the wall a bit and tried not to think his hand started to go through. After scratching his head, asking himself if this really was such a good idea, he leaned against the wall and closed his eyes hard. He forced all thoughts out of his head and felt his body starting to fall. His baggage-cart came with him (seeing that he hadn't let go of it) and he celebrated his success in his mind. And that's when it happened...

Harry had always been somewhat of a klutz. One time, when he was five, he had been allowed to watch the telly for a few minutes. He had been so happy, and had decided to watch as many channels he could. Something weird had happened then, as they often did when Harry became happy. The screen somehow started to show several programs at once, in smaller and smaller little- screens next to each other. The TV played all the sounds at the same time, and pretty soon you couldn't make out any individual phrases. Then it exploded. Harry's uncle Vernon had not been happy with him then, and had forbidden him from watching TV ever again.

But as for now, he was sitting on the ground observing his trolley. It was stuck halfway through. Harry wasn't very surprised; things like this had a way of happening around him, and absently searched his surroundings for a way to fix it. An inconspicuous button on the wall, right next to the secret entrance caught his attention. It was a lovely blue colour, and looked brand new. The sort of new that said to you, look! I've never been used before and was probably created by some freakishness just moments ago! Press me!!!

Harry pushed the button.

The wall that wasn't a wall at all started to shimmer in black and blue, not unlike the very blue colour of the button, and then is just went up in sparks that slowly fell to the ground and turned into little plastic swords that you could spear grapes with if you felt like it. Harry picked up one of the swords with just that action in thought. He then noticed the people staring at him; they were on both sides of the portal, wizards, witches, muggles and many many animals. He looked at his trolley and realized that it too had been partly turned into plastic swords! Hedwig, his Rat, had made it out alright so he wasn't overly worried, but all his books were currently in pieces.

Then People started to arrive, they simply popped out of nowhere, and waved their wands at the muggles (who got a glassy look in their eyes and went on their way) and the portal, which remained being plastic swords. Sadly Harry's belongings were lost, and he went on board the train carrying only his pet rat. He hoped the teachers would help him buy new stuff later...

When Harry found an empty compartment he closed the door after him, an accidentally broke the lock, which resulted in him spending the trip to Hogwarts alone. Many people looked in at him though, and he had much fun making faces at them during the whole trip. He left the train using a window, which also broke. Harry figured it must have been a good day so far, since things only got this bad when he was really happy.

The End

//Jesagon.


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own, nor do I earn, so you won't have to pay or sue!

Lucky you.

Ollivander.

It was late on the first of September. The students would have returned to school this evening, Ollivander noted without any real interest. The major business for the year was completed and from now till next year he would only have to sell a few stray wands and perhaps create some masterpiece or two.

But first, as every year, it was time to repair the wands that the children had tried. Many people thought only as far as they saw. That is to say, not very far at all.

They believed that you could allow hundreds of children to try a few hundred wands and not expect a few of them to broke, or worse, twist.

Twisted wands where really a pain, they would accept anyone, and would tweak that someone's magic a little bit every time it was used. In the end the unfortunate owner would go insane. This was something he had refused to tell anyone, if anyone ever realized Voldemort, or Tom Riddle as he knew him as, had gone insane after buying a twisted wand at his store his reputation would go down the drain.

Oh well, he had been drunk that day all those years ago, it was no helping it now. Besides, some people seemed rather happy to have a common enemy. Hmpf, this year he had felt some weird signals from quite a few of his beloved wands, most of them after that Potter boy had tried them. He had pretended that nothing was wrong as usual, but inwards he was seething.

Now he picked up one of the wands the boy had tried, and could without much problem tell it wasn't twisted. He breathed a sight of relive, but continued to study the wand. There was something about it… He noticed a small hole at the bottom of it, to small to clearly see into. He looked at his desk, and found a small needle which he pressed into the hole.

Too late he realized there must have been a compulsion charm involved for him to do something that stupid, and then the wand just… melted. There was no other way of putting it. He looked at the small pool of wand on the floor and then to the large pile of wands with similar signals on his desk.

Carefully he reached for another wand, and quickly found the small button in a hole at the bottom. He tried to, he really did, but the compulsion was too great and he pushed the button. This wand disintegrated completely.

Feeling a bit unnerved he reached for another wand, there must be some way to fix this without pushing the buttons! This time a small jelly crocodile emerged from the now empty case of wood.

After 4 hours the pile of wands at the desk was gone. Sadly, the same could be said about the wands themselves. Ollivander realized he had a lot to do this year, and also decided to ban one Harry Potter from his store for the foreseeable future. There was no way that demon would ever buy a wand from this maker ever again, no way!

The End.


	3. Chapter 3

I don't own any characters or themes coming from the Harry Potter series. J K Rowling does.

The mirror of Erised.

It was the day after Christmas. Harry was sneaking around aimlessly under the cloak he had received the day before. There had been a note attached that claimed it was his fathers invisibility cloak and that it was about time it was returned to its rightful owner, but both Ron and Neville had tried to convince him of that it had been some stupid joke.

They had claimed that they could still see him, but Harry didn't believe them. They were probably just afraid to go outside after hours. It must be why they refused to come along even after he invited them. Or maybe they were afraid of the dark and didn't want to tell him…

The cloak was red with pink dragons dancing around on it dressed in real spacey cloths, but he assumed that they also became invisible after he put the cloak on. He heard some voices up ahead and hurried forward so as not to miss the conversation. Harry was a very good eavesdropper. He turned around a corner and came upon two of his professors in a somewhat compromising position. He never would have thought that professor Quirrell was Snape's type. They had stopped talking and were just staring in his direction; confused Harry turned around and saw a painting of a sword-fighter that was rolling around the floor of his picture laughing. He figured that it was the probable cause of the sudden silence and turned back to his professors quietly.

"Detention Potter!" professor Snape bellowed.

He then backed of from professor Quirrell, letting the man stand on his own legs. Harry remained silent, but decided to go see Dumbledore first thing in the morning; he now had proof of that professor Snape gave him detention whenever he felt like it, even if he himself wasn't present. And even if he was technically present, it shouldn't matter since he was invisible and Snape couldn't see him.

Quirrell hurried away from the scene, but Snape still looked in his direction pointedly. It didn't make any sense. Harry looked behind him and saw the sword-fighter turning blue from lack of oxygen. Shaking his head a little he decided it was time for bed. Good thing this cloak was see-through from the inside.

Severus looked at the retreating form of the cloaked Harry Potter, wondering what had gotten into his head this time.

He could still smell the residue from the first potion potter had made when he entered the Potion classroom, it had to all outward appearances gone rather well for the boy that day. Then he had asked the Longbottom kid a question, as if he would know anything about potions. He remembered Granger's insistent warnings to Longbottom, not to listen to a word the Potter brat said, and then the two of them had paired of. It was a combination made in hell, he was sure.

Each and every class since had resulted in something strange, they claimed that they were experimenting. And maybe they where, the problem was that nothing those two ever did could be recreated even by two themselves. He had frequently asked them to stick to the lesson plan, but on the rare occurrence that they did (such as the first lesson) it all went downhill. Explosions were the minimum. The acid rain generated during the Halloween weak that put the entire class in the infirmary for most of the holiday was among the worst.

It didn't get better when they found out that Pomfrey had released them that night and all of them had walked in on the troll. Three of them went straight back to the infirmary and the rest was force fed calming draughts to avoid chocks.

As for why the resident weirdo chooses to go around at night dressed in a very Dumbeldoreish cloak in the middle of the night, he didn't want to know. He decided to not follow the little brat and went the other way, after Quirrell.

On his way back to the common room Harry got lost. He tried every door he could find in the hopes of finding the common room. In one of the rooms there was a mirror. Harry wasn't very vain and knew that with his hair people of both sexes tended to avoid him. (The hair, right…) But this mirror was a bit strange. His curiosity was awoken by the holy light that surrounded it, and the sound of angels singing in the background proved that the mirror was harmless.

In a corner of the room Albus Dumbledore admired his handiwork, he had managed to get the boy too look at the mirror after all. Now all he had to do was to find out what he saw.

"_Wait a second, how did he get his hands on my cloak?!"_

Albus looked down on the cloak he wore and cursed silently, he had sent the boy the wrong cloak. He had accidentally given away his favourite cloak. Now to get it back…

Harry walked towards the mirror in a very careless way, slinging his arms around widely, just to prove to the mirror that he understood that it was safe. Then he looked at his reflection.

What he saw would stay with him for years to come. It was his parents, it took him a few moments to recognize them, but it was them alright. He watched them closely. They seemed to make some movements with their wands, slowly as if to give him the chance to mimic them. He memorized the movements at the best of his ability, and then studied his parents more. His mother was rather beautiful with her copper hair and startling green eyes, his father was a lot like him. Or was it the other way? A cough behind him was heard, but Harry choose to ignore it, there was suddenly a strange button in the middle of the reflection. It wasn't part of the reflection though.

Albus, who was discreetly watching the glass tried to get Harry's attention again. Then he took note of the button that had appeared and felt a cold chill run down his spine in trepidation. He tried to reach Harry before the boy managed to press the button, and he did make it in time. Harry must have heard him, as he had stepped back from the mirror in surprise. Unfortunately Albus himself then fell into the area of compulsion and pressed the button. The mirror vibrated a little then went up in smoke. When the smoke had dissipated there was only a pair of socks left. Absently he picked them up while pondering on what to tell the world as he explained how a priceless artifact had turned into a pair of socks.

"Well, that's weird."

The boy's comment broke him out of his brain frozen state, and he turned around.

"Harry, what did you see in the mirror?"

Truthfully, he just didn't know what else to say.

"Um, if you don't mind headmaster, that's a little private."

"Oh, I can be confidential you know."

"Is that why everyone knows I survived the killing curse sir? I've always thought that if you didn't tell them what happened, no one would have known."

"Harry, they would have known anyway once the authorities had a chance to investigate."

"But the house is still under the fidelius."

"…"

"And if no one knew, then I wouldn't have had to live with my loving relatives…"

Albus mind was suddenly bombarded with ideas of the possible futures he could have arranged for the orphaned boy that night. Perhaps in another world, Harry was sane. And if dreams where butterflies they would all flutter around without destination... around and around. Maybe dreams where butterflies.

"... And then Sirius could have gotten himself that orange monkey."

Albus realized he must have spaced out a bit. It didn't seem as if he had missed anything important though. Now, how to get out of this mess?

"Harry, it would seem as if someone accidentally gave you my cloak, can I have it back please?"_ Smooth._

"Oh no, professor. This was a Christmas present from Santa. I think any resemblance towards your cloak is purely coincidental."

"Well... I am sorry but it was I who gave you that cloak, I have the one I intended to send to you right here. We can swap!"

Albus fumbled with the silvery material one the bench.

"I know it's a pretty cloak sir, but I won't swap. I know this cloak came from father Christmas, he knew my dad. And since it's a family relic I can't swap it away for anything really."

"But Harry..."

"You know what professor? I'm sure that if you look really careful in your office when you get there, you'll find your own cloak. It's not nice to take credit for Santa you know."

Harry left the room then. Leaving a confused headmaster with a pair of socks in one hand and a real invisibility cloak in the other. When he finally reached the common room he realized he should have talked about Snapes actions when he had the chance. Maybe the professor wouldn't believe him tomorrow...

The End

//Jesagon


	4. Chapter 4

I do not own the characters, I do not make profit of them. I do not even get reviews so far...

So you all know what to do! (Hey, that rhymes on, do not sue.) I also don't own Coca-Cola.

**The Philosophers Stone.**

Hermione Granger was in trouble and she knew it. She had just realized that the Philosophers Stone would be stolen this evening, by a professor none the less, and no one but Ronald believed her.

"Harry, you have got to believe me! He's after the stone. Why else would he..."

"I just don't see it Herm. And even if he is, so what?"

"So what? SO WHAT?! Have you heard nothing of what I have said the last fifteen minutes?"

"Yeah mate, He can become Immortal, even I head that."

"Ron, Hermione... would that really be so bad? He's already a ghost, so being an immortal ghost isn't that much different."

"You... you.."

"Professor Binns was your theory Harry, We're talking about Snape."

"And he's... Oh my god! He would be Potion master forever! Then what would I do for a living? We have to stop him, make him see that his time is now, not... forever... And when we have the stone... hehehehehe. "

"What are you talking about Harry? He's not going to use it for himself..."

"Does it matter Herm? We got him going, let's work with that."

Ron and Hermione dragged Harry towards the third floor, having failed to warn a teacher earlier Ron had come up with the brilliant idea to save the stone by themselves. Hermione decided that having Harry with them was a must, with him there the teachers would never even consider expulsion, and they'd probably earn points...

Harry didn't understand his friends sometimes. How did they come to the conclusion that Snape was after the stone anyway? It was obviously Binns. Who else would need the elixir of life, maybe it did more then bring back the dead? This demanded some thought. But that had to come later, right now he had to find some way out of this conspiracy his friends had started.

The three friends entered Fluffy's domain just as Harry came to that conclusion. The great three headed dog was overjoyed. It had just awakened from a nice nap, and then a few snacks showed up. One for each head! It must be good Karma. Fluffy decided to slowly walk forward, growling maliciously, and go for the person closest to each head. Fluffy started its' movement.

Then stopped. The snacks weren't acting like snacks should. One of them, with fluffy curly fur on its head was producing some strange sounds that made his ears hurt. One of the other two, the red one, smiled at him queerly and mumbled something, it reminded Fluffy of master. The last one, walked unconcerned towards the hatch Fluffy was watching for master. Fluffy wanted to stop it, but a strange feeling of dread, caused by the singing and little master replica, stopped him. He stared as the black one opened the hatch, and shouted something meaningless to the others and jumped down. The other two ran over and disappeared as well. Fluffy collected himself, looked around the room and saw that it was empty, and then walked towards the hatch. He didn't want his real master to know of his little blunder so he pushed it close with his nose and pretended it never happened. Woe to whoever entered next. He would have to go straight for the kill to make up for this.

Ron was feeling very nervous as he stared at the Cerberus and pleading with it to go to sleep. It wasn't working, and Harry was walking towards the hatch…

"Go too sleep Fluffy, don't you feel a little sleepy? It's music Fluffy…"

The dog was staring. Silently Ronald Weasley wished he had listened to his female friend when she claimed that she couldn't sing to save her life. It was true. But then again, they weren't dead yet…

"Hey Ron!, I don't think I want to go with you guys on this adventure of yours, So I'll see you later ok?!"

Ron could only stare at Harry as he jumped down the hatch leading deeper into this trial. Didn't he realize that it wasn't an exit? Surely even Harry wouldn't think someone just forgot the dog in the hallway…

He was pulled out of his thought as Hermione grabbed his hand and ran for the hatch. They made it safely there and jumped down.

Harry frowned when he noticed the plant that had entangled him. They had tricked him. He didn't know how or why, okay so he knew why; they couldn't do anything without him, but he didn't know how. He had spied on Fluffy's door for the whole week, when could they have planted this plant on the escape route? He looked at his friends pointedly and relaxed, they would better explain this soon.

"Hermione, help! This plant thing is killing me!"

"Oh Ronald try to focus for just one moment please."

It didn't seem as if they were paying him any attention… Harry was just about to do something foolish and utterly cool when he fell through the plant-layer and onto the floor-layer underneath. He now contemplated getting angry at the plant for dropping him so suddenly, but then spotted the exit.

"Hey up there! I'm leaving now. I'm going to straighten this out with professor Binns in his office. I'll see you guys when you are done adventuring. Ok?"

Harry didn't wait for their response and went trough the door.

"Harry, where are you?!"

Hermione called out in confusion, she looked around her, but all she could see was darkness.

"I'll get some light", said Ron's voice somewhere to her left. "FIENDFYRE!"

"RON! Are you insane?! You're lucky you failed… try a lumus."

"But, that so common… Lumus."

The plant let them go. Hermione was shocked at the simplicity of the task. Any first year could do it. And if Harry was any proof of anything the task didn't even require magic. For the fifth time since she started Hogwarts she felt disappointed at her professors. This was their best effort to protect a priceless artefact? She felt unsure of how well her attempt to forget this disappointment would be. It was so soon after the last. Only a few minutes…

Ron and Hermione entered a large bright chamber. They saw Harry unlock the door across the room. He spotted them, and hurried through and away. Luckily he forgot to close the door, and the two of them rushed after him. They spotted an enormous chessboard in the next room. Harry looked crestfallen.

"Do we have to play?" he asked in a low voice.

"It looks that way. But not to worry, I'm here to save the day! The amazing King of chess, Ron!"

"But you can play for ages…"

"We don't have time to argue Harry, just do what Ron says."

Harry sighted as he followed Ronald's commands and took the right black rooks place. As the game dragged on Harry began to lose patience, and started to think about ways to cheat. It was the only way he had ever won against Ron, so why not here? Of coarse, when Ron found out about what he had done…

Discreetly he cast a colour changing spell at one of the white players, changing it to black. No one seemed to notice. He did so one more time, enjoying the way the giant chess piece looked down on itself and confusedly turned around. Ron told him to take two steps forward, and Harry did so.

He heard somewhere in the background how Hermione pleaded with Ronald not to do something or another, but didn't care. It was the black sides turn to move. Harry whispered a jelly-leg curse at the white queen. She stumbled and fell unto the step next to her. The silence was broken by the White King who dropped his sword.

"What happened? We didn't win…"

"I think the white side cheated Ron." Harry told his friend.

"You think they cheated?! But, they're just game pieces?"

"Harry did you… No, I don't want to know. Let's just go."

In the area that followed a foul smell lingered. They determined that it belonged to the troll who sat busily in a corner with some king-sized Lego. Hermione and Ron walked right by and into the next room. Harry threw a longing gaze towards the Lego, and walked to the door leading further in, Just before he entered he turned around, summoned the Lego with a Wengardium Leviosa and some good old accidental magic in its' half controlled form, and ran into the next room. The troll roared with anger.

Harry walked in and was almost burned to death by the strange flames that erupted behind him. The Lego wasn't as fortunate. It became Lego ash. Harry turned around towards his friends wide-eyed, tears gleaming. They turned around to face him as the troll roared again.

"Harry, what did you do now?"

"The Lego… Ash…"

"Well, that certainly cuts down on the options."

"But there's only enough potion for one person!" Hermione exclaimed.

"Are you sure you're supposed to drink it then?"

"Of coarse we are! Why else would you have poisons among them?"

"Well if I'm honest with you Herm, I wouldn't drink it if it might be poison."

"Here then, do with it as you please, why ever not."

She handed the potion over to Harry. Ron didn't say anything, but privately thought she might have lost it.

Harry truthfully didn't know what to do with it. He had no idea to begin with of why his friends thought it was a good idea to drink something that might be poison. Then again, they where a bit strange the two of them. The space they stood in was surrounded by a strange fire. He knew that behind him there was no longer any Lego, but he had high expectations on the following room. He emptied the small flask of unidentified potion upon the fire that surrounded that part of the room. Nothing happened.

"Well. That was unexpected."

"You moron! That was the only way!!!"

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to waste your potion… should we try the others?"

Hermione didn't answer, so Harry threw the rest into the fire as well. It turned the fire inside out in some weird way. He carefully stretched a bit of fabric into it. It still burned.

"Maybe it… Actually, why were the potions here?"

"The note Harry! Didn't you read the note?"

She realized then that Harry had entered after her and Ron, and had in-fact not read the note. Ron was looking the other way. Harry read the note.

"Herm, you know my invisibility cloak?"

"Your what?!"

"Oh, I might have forgotten to tell you two about it… Santa gave it to me this Christmas, he knew my dad apparently. Anyway, this cloak makes me invisible."

Harry Pulled out his cloak from the previously unmentioned backpack he had with him. It was red with oddly dressed pink dragons dancing on it.

"You showed it to me mate, but it's not…"

"Right. You're just jealous aren't you?"

Harry covered himself in the see-through from the inside cloak and his friends shock their heads in amazement.

"I'm thinking it might be fireproof too!"

"No, you can't just assume…"

Hermione didn't manage any more words before the boy who lived stepped into the fire. He stood still for a few seconds and then stepped out again.

"It is! Come under and we'll continue. I'm right in front of you."

Harry said excitedly and stepped closer, opening the cloak wide to make room for them.

Ron couldn't believe that Harry's cloak actually had some use, and dragged a stunned Hermione with him under the cloak. Hermione didn't know what to think. Her friend was obviously insane, and believed his unnerving cloak was able to turn him invisible, not to mention assuming it was fireproof without testing it in a somewhat safe manner. She wasn't given much time to digest the levels of insanity he showed though. As soon as they stepped through the fire the enemy showed its ugly face. And it was not who she expected it to be.

Inside was Quirrell. He stood in front of a one-armed-bandit gambling machine looking a bit miffed. The three children watched silently as he put a galleon into the slot-hole and pulled the arm. Nothing happened.

Harry, having been forced to make the most of the little income he had saw immediately what the problem was. He dug around in his pocket in search of the solution he had so fortunately had received from his relatives for Christmas. After having found it he started to walk towards the wayward professor and called out:

"Professor, here try using this!"

Quirrell turned around quite fast and stared at the offered solution. Ronald and Hermione were shell-shocked. Quirrell picked up the small coin, and turned back to try it in the contraption. The machine awoke and started to play a happy little melody. The blippering sounds almost drowned the raspy muffled voice that chanted,

"Use the boy! The boy!"

Quirrell didn't miss the voice though and dragged Harry forward.

"Pull the lever child, and stand back."

Harry did so, and stepped to the side while watching the little wheels roll. Quirrell though stepped very close to the machine, not letting the wheels out of his sight. One of them stopped.

It was a Yellow seven. A few moments later the last wheel stopped as well, leaving the middle one rolling, it was a yellow seven too. Transfixed they all saw how the last wheel stopped on a yellow seven. A winning melody played and a small lightshow played on the surface of the apparatus, Harry held his breath. Then lemon drops started to flow out of it, a lot of lemon drops. Quirrell didn't have time to move out of the way of the candy wave that rushed at him, and was buried under it.

Harry walked around the contraption to see if he could find the refill hatch. He didn't really like lemon drops, but if there was any other kind of candies…

He did find the hatch, but when he opened it he could only find a little red rock. A rock.

Great, he thought and picked it up. He examined it in detail and saw a button. Absently he thought it a bit strange that he missed it at first glance, it covered an entire side, but he pressed it anyway. The rock wobbled a bit and shape-changed into a bottle of Coca-Cola. Surprised he opened it and drank some. It didn't taste right. But it was rather good. He would have to ask the headmaster if he could keep it.

During this little episode Ron and Hermione had dug out their professor, and secured his wand. They where just about to call for Harry and tell him it was time to leave when the fire behind them roared and exploded out into the room. They both threw themselves to the floor, away from the machine. The fire was out moments later, in almost all places. It turned out the mountain of lemon drops was highly flammable, and it was burning merrily. Quirrell was sadly laying on top of it all, stunned and now also burning to death.

Harry had stepped out from behind the device and was quite shocked by the sight of his professor burning. He felt a little sick and turned his head quickly. It did not prevent the scent from reaching his nose though. Oddly enough it made him a bit hungry.

Albus Dumbledore stared at the scene, he and the other professors had fought their way through the challenges, that had been a bit harder then they had intended right from the start.

First there had been Fluffy. It should have been easy to subdue the beast with some music, instead it had attacked anything that moved or made a sound. Two professors had been forced to give up then already, and had headed to the hospital wing.

The Devils Snare had then proceeded to grab for their wands the first thing it did. Three broke, and three was left behind. Hagrid had gotten stuck in the blasted thing as well, and Pomona had stayed to keep him alive until they returned.

In the key room they had searched for many minutes until their patience ran out and Albus blasted the door. It turned out the key had somehow ended up in the corridor behind the locked door, how it happened was anyone's guess.

The chess room had been utter chaos.

The pieces were waging an all out war against each-other. It took precious minutes to sort it out, and it was discovered that there was more black pieces then white. It was determined that the last player had cheated. They received the name Ronald Weasley.

The troll had taken down all but his best teachers, the injured had been sent to the infirmary pronto.

The potion room had been the last drop for Albus. When he and Minerva had turned to Severus for a solution he had merely shrugged and looked the other way. Albus had decided to end the frustrating task, and proceeded to blast the fire away.

As they had entered the room, and seen three pale looking students looking at a burning and now very dead professor, Albus thought he might have used a bit much force. The fire in front of him made him think of Fawkes, and he wondered how different the situation would be if he had simply flamed into the chamber he now observed. Well, hindsight was always twenty-twenty.

Harry felt some relief when the headmaster banished the burning pile of human flesh and candy. He looked too the professors who had entered, and noted that they looked a little green themselves. The headmaster waved him over, and he stepped forward together with his friends.

"What has happened here children?" He asked in a tired voice.

Harry looked to his friends; they looked a bit shocked beyond speaking so he decided it was his duty to inform the headmaster of their discoveries.

"We found out about professors evil plot." He began gradually.

"Ron and Herm thought it was Snape," a quick look to his professor made him correct himself. "Professor Snape I mean. They thought he was after some stone or something. But I knew it was Binns, he was after the elixir of life."

"Binns Harry? But…"

"Don't worry headmaster, I've got the elixir safe right here. It's rather tasty; do you think I could keep it? I've been thinking and I don't really mind being immortal that much."

The other occupants of the room could only watch the boy chatter on in horrid fascination, unable to speak because of his shocking oblique point of view.

"He needed the elixir to come back to life, I would recommend to have him exorcised as soon as possible to prevent future evil plans. As I'm sure you noticed he even possessed professor Quirrell to get to the elixir, and by doing so caused his death."

"Quirrell was possessed?"

"We heard his voice coming from the turban."

Albus realized then, that if he went with the story, Quirrell's death would be blamed on Binns and not himself. Harry had presented the perfect excuse.

"Harry, You can't keep the elixir I'm afraid. It belongs to an old friend of mine named Nicholas Flamel. He and his wife are its' creator."

"ok." Harry said dejectedly.

He handed over the bottle of Coca-Cola to his headmaster.

Albus felt a cold feeling of dread fill him from head to toe.

"This…"

"It was just a rock at first sir, then it changed when I pressed the button. If your friend didn't want anyone else to taste the elixir, perhaps he should make a smaller button. You van tell him that from me. And tell him it was really good."

"Ah, I believe I shall do so." Albus answered weakly, wondering how his hot-tempered friend would react to this information.

Some days later, it was the end-of-the-year feast at Hogwarts. The students were in high spirits, their professor had returned from the hospital wing only this morning, and many tests had been cancelled. Gryffindor was looking very good in the house cup race, and many were happy about it. Even more people didn't care, and a quarter of the school was fuming.

At dinner Albus Dumbledore stood up, to speak to the students.

"Attention, attention students!"

The hall quieted down, and faces turned towards the esteemed headmaster.

"It is almost time to award the house cup!"

Many cheers erupted from the Gryffindor table.

"But first there are some actions made recently by some of our students to take into account. First, I award twenty points to Hufflepuff, for successfully exorcising the evil professor Binns. We thank you mr Richard Timble." The Hufflepuff table cheered wildly.

Naturally everyone had heard the tale of Binns nefarious plans.

"I would also like to make an example for our students, to show you all that cheating even if the situation is dire is not commended, a hundred points from Gryffindor. I do hope you learn your lesson mr Ronald Weasley."

Everyone stared at the redhead. Slytherin broke out in cheers.

"From miss Hermione Granger in Gryffindor house, fifty points for knowingly placing another student in danger. And lastly a hundred points to Hufflepuff on mr Potters request for being so darn good background people and not bothering him as much as everyone else this year."

The Silence was deafening. Then Hufflepuff students started to dance around and scream in joy, Harry stood up and joined in on the fun.

"It seems as if a change in decoration is in order!" The headmaster waved his wand a bit and the emblems in the roof changed from the proud ion into the fierce badger, the colours shifter from red and gold to a more comfortable black and yellow. Most of the student population didn't come out of the shock of seeing Hufflepuff house win the cup for the first time in memory until it was time for desert. Hermione Granger seriously considered a change in house for the coming year. Maybe Ron would come as well?

The End.

Jesagon – review and be happy!


	5. Chapter 5

As usual I have yet to discover my ownership of the Harry Potter™; which means J. K. Rowling still gets to have the honours. Anyway, you may read this without charge, and I get to write it for free. Yay.

**The Longest Journey – a diary's tale.**** – part one**

It was a hot afternoon in the middle of the summer. The Hogwarts letters had been delivered as the amount of visitors to Diagon alley attested to. People where swarming everywhere, and this occasion was the worst in years. Many things played out simultaneously to create the chaos that disturbed the alley.

The new professor in defence against the dark arts at the school, Gilderoy Lockhart, was visiting the bookstore and giving out signed photographs to the lucky few costumers that made it to him.

In the very same bookstore people were searching in vain for the book the new history of magic teacher had assigned. The few people who had bothered to check found it in muggle London. On the other hand, such a thing had never happened before; a teacher choosing a muggle book for history, so most people didn't even consider it liable.

Unknown to most, this was also the day Harry Potter decided to do his shopping, and by doing that, he added to the chaos quote that was collecting.

Lastly, people where worried. The problem with the missing gate to platform 9 ¾ at Kings' Cross had yet to be solved. The past year had involved an on-duty Auror squad twenty-four seven, working together with an obliviating team. It had also caused the muggle trains to be late on a daily basis. But wizards and witches cared little for this fact.

The problem this year was that no one knew how the children were going to get to school. The train was out of the question, and many had ideas on how to solve the problem, but no one had a solution for all the students. And so naturally everyone was talking about it.

Ginerva Weasley was also in Diagon alley this day. She went together with her family, her mom and many of her older brothers. Bill and Charlie was obviously not here, they had both moved out of the house some time ago, and were too busy to come shopping with them.

Ron was here though; she had always gotten along with him. Truthfully all of her brothers got along with her, but the closeness in age to her youngest older brother had made him an ideal playmate in their younger days. The twins weren't bad either. But sometimes they were simply too focused on themselves for her taste.

The summer prior to her first year at Hogwarts had been filled with stories from the school. She had listened with rapt attention. The not so secret crush on Harry Potter that she had fostered since forever had taken a few hits though. It was a tough nut to melt; finding out that the man/boy of your dreams was more than just a few steps along on the way towards insanity. She was secretly hoping that her brothers exaggerated. This was the day she would meet him for the first time, he was doing his shopping with their family.

Ronald was watching his sister out of the corner of his eye, and took note of the starry eyes she had. It would seem as if operation get Gin-gin away from Potter had failed. Hopefully she would see reason as she met the poor bloke, if not; the Weasley family might have to take some drastic steps to prevent future catastrophes. It wasn't Harry fault that he was an unfit boyfriend for his sister… it was more like, someone a bit less egoistic than him would suit her better. Ron thought back to the reply he had gotten from Harry by letter when he had offered to come and get him for a summer visit.

Harry had said no. Apparently he had gotten into trouble with the ministry when he 'forgot' that magic was forbidden during the summer. After twelve visits and an equal amount of outrageous excuses he had been put in house arrest. For some unknown reason he had avoided expulsion, if Ron made a guess, it would be because of the fame factor.

Harry had then written about how he had played around the Dursley's house together with Hedwig. She was a magical rat, and had the ability to understand human speech. It was a bit scary to see how well she understood Harry. Ron remembered how his friend had ordered his rat to carry his book-bag for him during the first week last year. The rat had built a small carriage that it was pulling around with the bag on top. How the building part had been arranged was a mystery. Hedwig had also been particularly good at fooling Mrs Norris into going the wrong way at night when certain Gryffindors' were out after curfew. It was almost as if she was human, only not; a rather intelligent human with a nasty sense of humour. It was not uncommon to find Hedwig's little brown 'gifts packages' in your breakfast if you annoyed her or her master.

Ron had a rat as well, it was called Scabbers. His rat wasn't in the same class as Hedwig. Scabbers was a fat lazy thing that looked confused if you mentioned food. Harry hadn't liked the name Scabbers, and had consequently changed its name. Since then all of Gryffindor called the rat Binns Jr. At first even Ron had thought it was fun, but then Binns had been branded evil mastermind and Binns Jr was less than popular. A rumour had started; it claimed that Binns Jr was evil as well, that the evilness was in the name. Ron had tried in vain to explain the Binns Jr was actually Scabbers, but it seemed as if having an alter ego wasn't a good thing for evil beings. Harry had started a secret campaign to destroy this new threat to Hogwarts. It bothered Ron some that he was the first one to be invited, but at the same time it was rather nice. Harry was a truly puzzling chap.

A small distance away from the deeply in thought Weasley children, who was on their way to Gringotts bank with their family, Harry Potter himself was. He had been in the alley since five o'clock the same morning, and had already collected the necessary founds from the bank. At the moment he was talking to his pet ret, who had been nearly crushed by his uncles car earlier that week. Hedwig had miraculously survived and now looked like a deformed mummy, with all the bandages that covered her form.

"If you don't think you can handle it girl, that's alright. You can stay with the Dursleys this year. I'll leave you some money so you won't have to go hungry."

The rat merely stared at him with blank eyes. Harry had started to worry about her. It seemed as if her intelligence had been affected by the accident. She didn't nod or shake her head or anything. It was a pity, she had been such a great rat, and he loved her very much. But if she felt unable to go with him to Hogwarts he wasn't going to force her. Since she liked Dudley so much Harry assumed she wanted to stay with him instead, and she had yet to respond to his suggestions. He would miss her the following year. Harry busied himself with another ice-cream as he waited for the escorts Dumbledore had insisted on.

Twenty minutes later he heard a shout. Normally it wouldn't attract his attention, but since someone was shouting his name he felt it prudent to respond.

"Yes?"

For some reason the one shouting didn't hear his response, and the shouting continued. Harry looked on in confusion as several red-headed people shouting his name walked past the café he sat at. Other people were staring at the red-heads as well. The small army disappeared from view. Harry picked up his backpack, Hedwig and the memento plastic sword he had gotten a year before and followed them.

He caught up to them outside Ollivander's store. This time they noticed him quickly.

"Harry dear, there you are. Come here…"

The mother of the group was very cuddly, Harry concluded.

"We were just about to buy a wand for Ginny here. Why don't you come with us?"

Harry nodded and followed them into the store.

"Mum, why does Ginny get a new wand? I only got Charlie's old one…"

"Ginny couldn't use any of our old ones, Ronald."

It looked as if he wanted to add something more, but a shout distorted his thought.

"OUT, GET OUT OF MY STORE YOU FOUL BEAST. YOU DARE ENTER MY SANCTUM AGAIN?! LEAVE BEFORE I CALL THE AURORS!"

An irate shop owner had appeared. Highly perplexed the large group of people began to move out of the store.

"Oh, you don't have to leave Madame. Your children may stay likewise. Only the demon needs to leave." He indicated Harry to move out. Harry did, even if he had no idea of what was going on. The twins followed him out.

Inside the store the mother of seven looked to Ollivander for some sort of explanation. The man looked at his costumers and said, all the while blushing a little;

"It's personal…"

"Right. Well, this is Ginny, my daughter…"

"Right, which is your wand hand miss?"

Outside Fred and George had planned on grilling the Potter boy on some nice details, but something else caught their interest.

"Sweet Merlin, what happened to Hedwig?"

"Was she poisoned by Binns Jr?"

"My uncle drove her over with his car by accident."

"How does she eat? Even her nose is bandaged…"

"Well, I insert a straw right here…"

"Can she move at all?"

"No. But I'm hoping for a full recovery."

"How long has she been bandaged?"

"Since this morning, the accident happened a week ago, but I didn't think she looked that bad at first. The pet-shop-owner seemed a bit mystified that she was still alive though."

"Ah…"

The twins shared a look, and shook their heads together, decision made. They just wouldn't go there. Instead it was time to pursue their original quarry.

"So Harry,"

"Our dear fake brother,"

"What did you do?"

"To get Ollivander so cross?"

"I'm not entirely sure… I've only seen him once before, and that was the time I bought my wand. I tried a lot of them at the time, and he seemed quite pleased then."

"It's unfair I tell ya'…"

"That our fake brother can rile people up"

"Without even trying."

The shopping trip went on without a hitch, until they entered the bookstore.

Harry walked backwards into the store, staring back towards the ice-cream parlour that was for some reason housing a small hoard of walking tables with matching chairs. People were laughing at the poor fellows who sat on the furniture while trying to eat their treats.

A distant call made it to Harry's ears before the door close.

"It was the buttons!"

Mrs Weasley didn't know what to do with herself. She was in the same room as her hero, the great and handsome Mr Lockhart. The other people in the store seemed to be in a similar state of mind, and the crowd surrounding the man was enormous. She absently told her children to find their books, while she would get their defence books for them. A quick look towards Harry made her alter her plans slightly, and she caught hold of his sleeve as he walked backwards into the store. He sure was an odd one, the poor thing.

With the small celebrity with her, the chances of meeting the hero she read so much about would rise substantially. Not once did she think about the fact that her other children had been given free rains on their book collecting. The twins especially were having a field day.

It turned out Molly had been correct in her assertion, and she was dragged forward as soon as the honourable Gilderoy caught sight of the-boy-who-lived. He started to blabber about making front page, and Harry looked as if he wanted to object. Molly intervened.

"Surely you don't mind posing for just one photo, Harry?"

"Listen to her, Harry boy; you don't even have to do it for free!"

"But…"

"I understand you are here shopping with this beautiful witch and her family?"

"Yeah…"

"He is the little dear, his own family was busy."

"I see, but worry not. I the great Gilderoy Lockhart will pay for all the books you need this term young man. And as a gift for the magnificent witch that takes time out of her pockets to escort you I'll extend this privilege to her family as well!"

"Oh, you needn't do that Mr. Lockhart…"

"You mean you'll pay for my books?"

"Yes boy, that is what I mean, and no worries my lady. Which one is your child? Just point her out and I'll add it to my tab."

"Oh my, I don't know how to thank you…"

The reporters around them was eating it up, and the few people that held the honoured writer in very low regard laughed silently as the redheaded mother of seven pointed out her five children to the man, and the colour slowly drained out of his face.

Harry didn't understand the weird man; he had a creepy smile and walked around paying for children's books. He would have assumed the man to be some kind of paedophile and wanted nothing to do with him, but Mrs Weasley didn't seem to mind his presence. Then was the fact that his best friend's family would save quite a bit of money on this trip, so he kept silent as the photos were taken. He spotted a classmate from school in the back of the store though, and managed to sneak away when the blond grownup with shiny teeth gave another brilliant smile to the spectators.

"Hi Draco!"

"Potter."

"Are you here shopping for next year? Or are you thinking of a present for me? You don't have to, I missed yours and all."

"You?, would you just leave me alone you nutcase?"

"It's my birthday today! That's what I'm talking about."

"Look Potter, I don't care. I'm waiting for my father, so if you'll just…"

"Is he blond, and have good teeth?"

"Well, yeah…"

"But why don't you have the same last name? I met him just before talking with you."

"What are you talking about Potter? Of course we have the same last name!"

"Can you tell him I said thanks, I'm sure the Weasley family is very grateful as well."

"The Weasleys?!"

"Yeah, for the books."

"He gave it to them already?"

"He did."

"Oh, well, I'm leaving then. See you at school Potter."

"Sure thing Draco, and don't feel pressured to buy me a present or anything…"

"You just don't give up do you?"

The blond boy walked away from the black haired one. Harry observed as he stopped to talk to some other relative of his, the looked remarkably similar, not at all like the boy's father and him who was as different in appearances as dragons and daisies. The older man handed Draco some book or another and the boy went to the Weasleys. The two of them left after having delivered the book.

Hermione Granger almost lost her balance as she landed after her very first journey by portkey. The people around her were not as fortunate. Children where spread around her on the grass, only a few had managed to remain standing. One of the ministry officials motioned for the children to move out of the way, to make room for the next cluster of students that portkeyed to Hogwarts.

They had found a solution to the train station dilemma, they being the ministry, and while it didn't make the same impression on the first years they hoped that the following picnics could make some of it up to the poor dears. Socializing was important after all.

Hermione looked around her trying to spot any of her friends. She had never had the opportunity to visit Hogsmede before and wanted to enjoy the experience together with her friends. A group of redheads to her left was all the notice she needed to find one of them, Ron would stick with his family until they all found their company. While walking towards them she was suddenly thrown forward as something crashed into her back.

Feeling a bit groggy and tight around the chest she tried to move. It didn't work.

"Hello stranger. Thank you for catching me."

An Auror hurried over and helped the unknown first year off of her.

"My name is Luna Lovegood, what is yours?"

Hermione stared. In her mind terrible scenes from a possible future played out, one where this girl met Harry.

"Oh, I'm Hermione Granger. Don't get sorted in Gryffindor."

The little girl cocked her head to the side but nodded and walked away. Phew, crisis averted.

When she finally reached the redheads Ron was already accompanied by Harry. The latter looked a little sad and was keeping his gaze locked on the horizon.

"Hey guys!" she greeted them cheerfully. Ron waved at her and Harry grunted something unintelligible.

"Right, are you ready for the picnic?"

"Am I ever? I'm starving!"

"Aren't you always?"

"Hey!"

"Harry, is something wrong? You're awfully quiet."

"I miss Hedwig. She wanted to stay home with Dudley this year."

"She was in a rather bad shape last time wasn't she mate?"

"Nah, she was alright…"

"But the bandages…"

"Oh those, I removed them when I got home. She couldn't run in her new wheel."

"Er, Harry could she move without them?"

"Well, I have to assume so. She was resting quite a bit when I left. I didn't actually see her move, but then again, sometimes she's really quick."

"Yeah…"

"How's Binns Jr by the way?"

"He's doing fine. Sleeping as usual."

"I can hardly wait 'till classes start!"

"So Herm, I couldn't help to notice the poor innocent first year that landed…"

"Quiet Ron, He can't know!"

"Huh?"

"Nothing Harry!" *Smile* *Smile* *Twinkle* *Twinkle*

"You know the twinkle!"

"This is your sister I presume?"

"Yeah, Ginny say hello!"

"Umm, Hi."

"I'm Hermione. If you want, I can make a study schedule for you."

The little girl's mouth dropped open in shock. A little diary she carried clutched in her hands dropped as well.

Gilderoy was having a day, so to say. He had signed and given away more than a hundred photos of himself, and he hadn't even gotten to Hogwarts yet! The ladies was surrounding him, while not usually considered a problem these ladies where a tad young for him. His trained eyes searched the crowd and soon fixed on a black mop of hair that could only belong to one Harry Potter. He started to move forward excusing himself every each step.

"HARRY! I'm sorry, could you let me through? HARRY POTTER! CAN YOU HEAR ME?!" The boy turned around and waved happily. He pulled on the sleeve of a girl to his side saying something quite enthusiastically.

As Harry heard his name being abused yet again in a short amount of time he turned around to see who was at fault. The glossy man from the bookstore was easily recognized and so he waved at the man.

"Look Hermione, its Malfoy's father!"

"It is not!" A very affronted voice sounded behind Harry. Harry turned around, together with his assortment of friends, now counting three, to see Draco Malfoy standing there huffing.

"But he looks just like him!"

"They look nothing alike!!!"

Hermione and Ron was trying their best and failing to keep the laughter in check. Ginny had yet to recover from earlier and was still staring at her brother's friends, trying to edge away discreetly.

"Harry! There you are!" Gilderoy had arrived at the scene.

"Hi mr… What was your name again?"

"Hah, very funny child. Surly you remember…"

"You are not my father!!!" At Dracos yell several previously uninterested people started to listen in. The plot continued to thicken.

"But you said it was him in diagon Draco, you don't have to hide it."

Gilderoy was paling rapidly, staring transfixed at the young boy who reminded him so much of that fling he had a few years ago.

"I… I have a son?!"

"No way! I'm telling you, and you stay out of this Potter, you are not my father!"

Harry gasped, and stared at his new professor.

"You have a brother, don't you?"

_How did he know?! I've hidden it so well…_Lockhart was close to panicking. He flushed and stammered incoherently for a few moments. Draco looked horrified.

"It can't be, your telling me we're related?"

"Yeah, I saw his brother in diagon alley when I visited in the summer, they're practically identical." Now, most people took very lightly on that morsel of information.

"Wait, thank god, your wrong. They don't, I mean, we don't have the same name. That means we can't be related. I share my father's name."

People around them was whispering silently, things where getting relatively excited. Harry's friends looked back and forth amongst the participants in fascination.

"But maybe one of them got their name in marriage! It's pretty common to change the name when you marry, after all."

"And by pureblood tradition, the name goes with the man!"

"Professor, is Lockhart your given name?"

The professor in question fainted.

"What is going on here?!"

"Professor McGonagall!" the crowd chorused. The witch managed to make her way forward and looked expectedly at Harry.

"Why do you assume I did it?" He tried his new and upgraded version of the puppy-eyes-look. It worked fabulously. The angry witch turned to Malfoy.

The Blond was however in chock, staring blankly at the fainted man on the grass mumbling to himself; "It's not true, it can't be. Not possible. They would have told me…"

She turned back towards Harry. Ok so it wasn't perfect yet…

"I've gathered this, Dracos father married into the Malfoy line and haven't told Draco. He was born as a Lockhart, and is secretly professor Gilderoy's twin brother. The professor haven't met his brother in several years and fainted when he found out that he just missed him in diagon alley this summer, and Draco's older brother is being kept secret from the whole world! We should save him, it's probably Binns evil plan again!"

Hermione hid her face in her hands in both embarrassment and frustration. She hadn't a clue as of what they where talking about, but even then she could tell there where gaps in her friends story. Gaps of the noticeable kind.

The next morning, an article about Professor Lockhart covered the front page of the daily prophet. The headline read; **Mysterious Twin? Unlocking the heartaches of the Lockarts'!**

The article wrote of how the poor twin of Gilderoy had to marry into a known family to escape the evil dark lord Binns wrath many years ago, how they hid away their oldest son from the world for his own safety and how they would finally be reunited with the help of the readers, if they just sent in some tips of where to find the lost twin.

In the same paper, in the lost and found section, a small notice had been posted.

**Diary found, says its' name is Tom, contact Aberforth in Hogsmede for more info.**

Aberforth Dumbledore, younger brother of Hogwarts esteemed headmaster Albus, was a bit upset. The other day he had found a diary on his walk around town, he had checked both outside and inside to try and find out whom it belonged to. It reminded him of a diary he had seen in the hands of his brother some years ago, and that intrigued him. Albus had once kept a diary of all the candy he ever ate and made. To find the recipes of the worst candy addict in last century and this, well it might at the least explain some things.

In the end he had written in the book. It had responded in more ways than one. The ink had told him the name of the thing, but Aberforth, very experienced in the workings of the world, had also noted the attempts to get into his mind the book had done. What the book would hope to accomplish by entering his mind he really didn't know, but his gut was telling him it was some sort of spy sent out by an unknown enemy.

Reading the paper the next day, he started to wonder about this dark lord Binns, could he be the culprit? It didn't matter much. His mind shielding skills where up to par and he didn't fear any diary. Besides, he had a costume to plan.

Over the next couple of weeks Aberforth tried in vain to get the diary to spill its' beans, but it never did. The whole thing frustrated him to no end.

At Hogwarts, the golden trio was once again settling in to their schedule. Ron's little sister Ginny was making many friends amongst her classmates, she had been sorted into Gryffindor surprising absolutely no one. Hermione had done her best to keep a certain Luna Lovegood away from Harry, but it was getting difficult. Ron was trying his absolute best to diffuse the evil rumours Harry continued to spread about Binns Jr. Harry missed his own pet rat from time to time, until one morning…

The students where chatting as usual, everyone was cheerful to some degree. Harry looked at the owls that flew in moments ago to deliver the mail. It was Saturday, the best day of the week, and yet he felt a little out of it. He hadn't seen any buttons in ages, and they had homework. He had finished it already, but it was the principle of things. He mustn't like homework. Neville Longbottom had promised to help him in herbology today.

Yesterday had been somewhat embarrassing, with all the fainting he had done. They had been assigned some strange plants, and where meant to re-pot them. Harry, not feeling patient enough to listen to long explanations, had simply pulled his plant from it's soil and then seen the world grow dark around him. As it turned out, they where screaming plants and had the power to knock people out. They also killed, but things like that didn't much bother the-boy-who-lived. He had become immortal anyway. Maybe… the best thing would be if he got a hold of Dumbledore's' friend…

Anyway, Professor Sprout had assign Neville to teach him some common sense in the greenhouse, and the importance of earmuffs.

A large owl suddenly landed on his breakfast. A large package was tied to one of it's' leg and it bended owner to steal the bacon from Ron's plate. Harry freed the bird from it's' burden.

It was a box, unsigned and only a few holes marring its wholeness.

Harry opened the box, tearing it up and cackling insanely. His friends jumped slightly at the sudden activity, but stayed silent with the rest of their table, looking at the show.

A sudden screech from the package made him stop. From the piles of paper a ruffled rat crawled out, missing its tail. Harry looked to the paper still in his hand, and saw the missing tail.

"Hedwig! You're injured! Help, Madame Pomfrey!"

The disastrous day ended well. Hedwig had gotten her tail reattached by the nurse and also proved that Harry had been right. She had recovered completely from the summer ordeals.

Neville had managed to get Harry very interested in Mandragoras, the plants; so much even that Harry now had two of his own in the greenhouse to take care of. In return Harry promised Neville to spend some more time to experiment on their potions. Ron's twin brothers joined them in their study group. It was the start of a wonderful cooperation.

Time went quickly, and soon Halloween was at the door.

Lucius Malfoy was very bothered. Some months ago he had placed one of his master's invaluable objects in the hands of the blood traitorous female child of his enemy. He had expected some sort of sign in the papers, and if not that, some form of complain to the board of governors. He might not know exactly what the little book was supposed to do, but it sure as **** wasn't this; Nothing. Not even Draco had perceived anything peculiar, or so he claimed. Nothing was happening.

Lucius however, had not simply thrown away the book at the first opportunity, no he had planned it. He had backup plans, and other plans that would go in effect if the backup plans somehow failed him. He had been forced to wait until a year that allowed him to get close Hogwarts came. Get close in disguise.

And finally it came, it was the hundredth anniversary of Hog's Head and every month they housed a costume party with free drinks. It was close to Halloween and Lucius was preparing his costume. As luck would have it, he could attend as Gilderoy Lockhart, sneak out and go to Hogwarts. No one would know he had been there, even if he was seen it would be normal. The plan was to find the diary, see if any changes had occurred and if necessary, switch holder. Narcissa was the one to come up with the idea for the costume; she thought it was hilarious for some reason. She had acted a little strange the last months, collecting the papers before he had a chance to read them, making clip-books from certain articles and giggling all the time. Lucius shook his head as he glamoured his face into resemblance.

When he entered the hogs' head a multitude of people in different costumes met his sight. The one that shocked him the most was his master, Lord Voldemort himself, who was standing in the bar serving drinks. He made his way over.

"Master?"

The dark lord turned to him, stating;

"I always knew you where one of them!"

"Of course I am! I'm your most loyal…"

"And here's a drink for you!"

The dark lord handed 'Gilderoy' a drink, which he felt compelled to consume. It was a gift from his master after all. The night continued and many more drinks were consumed, both by the death eater and the 'master'.

In one of the minds at the party, something not so joyful took place. A consciousness that had been trapped in a diary for many years, and had recently been in the hands of a very good occlumens, found that the shields protecting its intended victims mind was weakening. After hours of looking he managed to take control of the host. A few things became clear to him as this happened. One, the old man had drunk a lot of alcohol. Two, he had a slightly higher tolerance for the stuff, that was the reason he was still in control and conscious. Three, he himself was still very drunk. And lastly, the secret passage to Hogwarts that could be found in the painting on the second floor was blocked by some blond drunken idiot who claimed to be his follower.

He managed to stumble through the pathway, dragging his self-proclaimed follower with him. Everything was unsteady, and if his eyes didn't deceive him the floor was a glowing green colour. He decided not to trust his eyes.

"Where a' we goin' mas'er?"

"To the loo…"

"Oh…good."

As they made it to the other side he tried to focus on the plan. It was difficult.

The two of them stumbled out in a empty hallway inside the castle. They stumbled onwards until 'Gilderoy' found a magical camera on the floor. He giggled and took a picture of his master, who just then stumbled into an empty armour which fell to the ground with a crash. They made it to a bathroom, and Lucius in disguise took a few more photos of the going-ons. He didn't notice how the pictures developed in seconds and fell down as he continued walking.

"It's not here!"

They left the bathroom in search of another one.

It was the morning after Halloween. The castles inhabitants where just starting to make their way to the breakfast tables, but something strange made most of them stop, green shining footsteps where everywhere in the corridors. The teachers bade all students to wait in the great hall as they investigated the strange markings. They found to their confusion that the footsteps trekked from one bathroom to another; in one of the bathrooms a statue of Gilderoy was found.

Gilderoy asked if he could place it in his office but the headmaster stopped him saying it was a real person in there albeit petrified. They took the statue to the infirmary. When they reached the great hall, to inform the students of what they had found and how this affected them, they where intercepted by some of their second year students. Hermione Granger dragged a reluctant Harry Potter forward.

"Professors, Harry have something to tell you. Don't you Harry?"

The boy looked to the side, and sighted.

"But Hermione, they where so funny…"

"He found some photos."

This caught the teachers' attention; the statue they had found had held a camera in front of his eyes, about to take a photo. The film was ruined though, and had not given them any clue as towards the real identity of the man.

"May I have them Harry, it is important!"

"Well, headmaster, I suppose. But, in return, maybe you could tell me who made that coke-of-life, so that I might contact him or her?"

"Er, you mean my friend Nicholas? It was the Flamels' who made the philosophers stone…"

"Oh, I should have known, I read about the Flamels' in muggle school! It was a history assignment. I failed that class…"

"Right, the photos lad?"

Harry handed over a large bunch of photos. He conveniently forgot to mention that he had made copies of all of them with the twins help. Several had been handed out amongst the students.

The teachers were shocked at the contents of the pictures, Voldemort had been in the castle, and if his behaviour was any indication he had not been of sound mind.

Hopefully, the media would never know of this. And when did the dark lord return? Dumbledore was stunned, a message on a wall, written in the blood of chickens if the photos where to be believed, claimed that the **dark lord Binns was here**. It was written in the history of magic classroom. Albus briefly pondered on how they had missed this fact on their sweep of the school. Maybe the green stuff had worn of by then… but… no, best not to think of it.

Harry tried to get the headmasters attention, after a few minutes he snapped out of whatever thought his mind where preoccupied with, and he turned to face the young one.

"It's Malfoys dad!"

The entire hall heard him, and a distraught Draco tried to diffuse the situation.

"There is an easy was to unravel this. We simply need to give Malfoy Sr a floo call."

Narcissa Malfoy had found the whole; Lucius is Gilderoys missing brother, theory hilarious. She had gone to great lengths to keep this from her husband so that the papers could continue the story. She had even written some anonymous tips to deepen the mystery. When her husband was going on a costume party, she convinced him to go dressed as his 'missing brother'. Honestly, she would have never thought he would agree, but he only got a mystified expression on his face and agreed without any protests. She had wondered then, if Lucius knew about the rumours, and secretly found them amusing as well. But she kept quiet.

When she got a floo call the morning after, the headmaster of Hogwarts himself, inquiring about her husbands whereabouts, and then realizing he had not returned was not so amusing.

She travelled to Hogwarts, and found her petrified husband. They all seemed rather shocked at the fact that this was Lucius, and indeed, what was he doing at the castle in the middle of the night? She decided to go with the most obvious reason that presented itself so clearly.

Her son was not so happy about this, and she would have no time to explain properly.

"He dressed out for a costume party, it was held at the pub in Hogsmede, at Hogshead. He wanted to visit his long lost brother, but needed a few strengtheners before the trip. I'm afraid he must have been kidnapped on the way."

Dumbledore looked decidedly doubtful and showed her the photos.

"He must have had a few drinks to many as well…"

Narcissa later admitted to herself, that no, she didn't really like the situation, but it was still hilarious. She had many clippings for her album in the next few weeks. She even added the distressed letters from her son, he was such a little ignorant fool at times.

And here is the end of part one!

It's simply getting too long for my conscious or what not.

Anyway, look forward to part two, coming to you as soon as it's ready!

Jesagon.


	6. Chapter 6

Hello again, as a tribute to all reviewers in the world I write this. I don't own the figures or rights or whatever it is people own, but I enjoy writing (for free) about them. I hope you all enjoy reading about it. Now then, review! And feel free to complain on my language, I'd like to improve, and that is easiest done when you know what you do wrong…

Without further ado;

**The Longest Journey – a diary's tale. – part two.**

Harry and Neville were out in greenhouse two, taking care of their mandragoras. Their friends had both been petrified some weeks ago, just before Christmas break. They, Ron and Hermione, had been found in a corridor. It seemed as if they had been playing the new game that was so hip and cool in the castle. You used mirrors to make the rays of your lumus hit your opponent thereby scoring points.

The green footprints had been there this time as well, the photos had not. It didn't matter; the paintings reported having seen Binns, alive and well, walking the corridors.

Harry had asked Neville a question for the last fifteen minutes without the other boy even reacting. He was beginning to think it was the earmuffs fault, but ignored it.

"Neville, do you think it's supposed to dress like this? Neville?"

Neville patted the soil on his plant, and threw a look in Harry's direction. A most disturbing sight met him. A Mandragora dressed in a miniature cloak, identical to his friends 'invisibility cloak', and underneath, skin(?)tight leather with snake patterns.

A hand suddenly landed on his shoulder, and he jumped a bit. Harry finished potting his plant and turned to greet Draco as well.

"Potter, I'm still not going to forgive you."

Indeed, ever sins last Halloween, Draco's position in Slytherin had shifted drastically. Being related to the honoured Gilderoy wasn't very fantastic in those circles it seemed.

It turned out Draco didn't have that many friends, and now he hung out with the two freaky Gryffindors. At least they where more or less pureblood…

"Hi Drake."

"Morning Malfoy."

"How are your plants?"

"They're looking green."

"Yeah? What does that mean?"

"They dress funny."

"Potter?"

"Don't ask him Malfoy, you won't like the answer."

"True."

"So, I was thinking of introducing you guys to my invisible friend today."

"Harry, is this the one you made up before?"

"It is, but she's real! She's living in the walls and all, and likes to talk about Binns Jr and his relatives. She says they're tasty. I was thinking, with Ron gone for the moment…"

"We're not eating his rat, Potter."

"And you know we can't hear her voice, we tested last week."

"Maybe you ate something wrong? If we eat…"

"No!"

"No!"

"You're no fun sometimes."

"Did you write those people, Flames?, a letter?"

"I did! And it's Flamel, Draco. They sent me some of that drink, apparently it didn't work as an elixir of life, and they where going to die, but it was still very special. They wrote to me, and said that since I basically created the stuff, I should have some."

"Can you imagine what you could with it, finding out all its properties, experimenting with it…"

"And all the good it might do in the world…"

"Hm, well, you could have done all that I guess, but I drank it all to lunch yesterday. I was going to share with you guys, but it was so good… sorry."

"You drank it?"

"It was invaluable Potter!"

"I said I was sorry, besides I wrote to the Flamel's and asked for some more. They haven't answered yet though."

"Why would you want more? They're dying right? Shouldn't you shove them some kind of respect and all that?"

"I would Neville, but It really wasn't my idea, Luna wanted some. It seems to repel Wrackspurts particularly well."

Later that day Harry walked alone in one of the corridors of Hogwarts, ignoring the teachers orders completely. It's not as if anything evil would dare to get close to HIM anyway. Just look at what happened to the last one, he had been exorcised. A voice thundered around him.

"Little hume, is it you?"

"Snaky! I thought you where a fiction of my mind, but your back!"

"What iss a fiction of mind child?"

"I'm not sure, but my other friends said you where, if you don't come back."

"I'm hungry little one, have you brought me this Binns Jr you told me about? I have longed so to see him."

"My friends won't even let me near him, they say I shouldn't eat rats. Maybe you shouldn't either?"

"Nonsenssse, if only you didn't like your Hedwig so much…"

"I promise, if she ever turns evil, you can have her."

"Thank you little hume."

"Where do you come from anyway? Sins it's not from my mind and all."

"I wass awakened by my masster, I live in thisss school."

"Who is this masster?"

"Sha sha sha, you should not try to hiss little one, until you can do so properly. My masster iss the heir of Sslytherin. He comes to me from a diary."

"A diary? I'll take it to you if I'll ever find one then."

"You do that youngling."

"I have to go now, I'm a little hungry as well, and it's dinner time."

"Farewell then."

Aberforth was trying to come up with an idea for a costume for this weekends costume party. So far, he had been Voldemort, Binns – the dark lord, and Grindelwald. The only night he had any memory of was the night as Grindelwald, not very strange as that was the only night he had refrained from drinking himself. It didn't matter though, this time he didn't have any idea about what sort of a costume he should wear. And without costume he couldn't attend his own party, damn the rules…

Maybe Albus had an idea? It couldn't hurt to ask. But, best make sure to ask after dinner, a hungry Albus wasn't a pretty sight. It isn't as bad as one without candy, but it isn't far off.

After having waited for roughly twenty minutes Aberfourth threw some floo powder into the fireplace and said Hogwarts headmaster's office. He put his head into the flames and found himself face to face with Albus himself.

"Just who I was looking for, Albus how are you?"

"I should hope you are calling my office with me in mind, have you been talking with Lockhart again? He doesn't appreciate being called death eater. I am fine as always."

"True, but you should know that the man confessed to me in person several months ago."

"Did you have a purpose or is this a social call Aberfourth?"

"I have only a slight favour to ask. Do you have any theories of who could be a future dark lord perhaps? It is only… academic interest."

"I have no names in mind. Though, you should try and find someone popular with a dark past. Someone with something to prove, and who might be a bit exploited…"

"Oh, I think I have an idea… I will see you next week then Albus? You'll come down for a drink right?"

"We'll see, these are troubled times I'm afraid."

"So I've heard. How is it going up there by the way? Are they still petrified?"

"I'm afraid so, We do have some diligent students taking care of the mandragoras though. It should take care of the problems before this term is over."

"I still don't see why you won't simply import some fully grown ones from the continent."

"The idea hadn't crossed my mind. Is it possible?"

"You could ask that potion master of yours, if you have the contacts anything is possible."

"I will see to it first thing tomorrow!"

"Goodnight then old chap."

"Good night Abe."

The night came and Aberfourth stood at the bar. When people started to arrive then went immediately to him, shaking his hand and asking for autographs. They even insisted on buying the free drinks, and drinks for him. He knew the costume was behind it, and dreaded what the future would bring to the original. If people acted like this to a fake…

"Oh, Mr Potter! Can I have your autograph?"

Then again, what did it matter? This was great for business!

Hours later a wobbly dark lord crept towards Hogwarts inside a painting. He had drank entirely too much this evening. He managed to find the correct bathroom on the third try this time, it was a good day! He hissed at the sink, and called out for his snake.

"Potter, what are you doing here ay this time of night? And in a girls bathroom?!"

"Huh?" The dark lord twisted around confused. A tall man stood there, he had black hair and a large nose, as for the rest; he could make out black clothes. The other details disappeared in the hazy fumes that inhabited his mind.

"Are you drunk? You are going to get expelled for this you… strange boy."

"Wha…? Who are you?"

"Oh for goodness sake, Potter. Come here, I'll get you a sobering potion."

The professor turned around, saw the reflection of a pair of huge yellow eyes in the windows and was petrified. Voldemort scratched his head, decided it was a job well done and told the snake to return to its lair. He then made his way out of the castle. As he entered the frame to the secret passage a diary fell out of one of his pockets.

Headmaster Dumbledore was a troubled man. Just yesterday he thought that all his problems would be resolved, than this happened. His potion master had been petrified sometimes during the night. Now, even if the mandragoras where to grow up completely, he had no one to brew the potion required to un-petrify the victims. He feared that the ministry would try and get him removed from his position. So far, nothing had been said to the cause, but Lucius absence would not protect him much further.

The paintings had reported to him, they said Potter was behind the schemes this time. After having questioned the boy thoroughly all he had gathered was that Binns had dressed as Harry to get revenge, the message on the wall that was still there sins the first visit on Halloween strengthened the thesis. Was it all true? Was Binns really evil? A few years ago Albus would have been hard pressed to believe it, but with all the evidence… Or was it some new dark lord who sought to use the deceased professor's reputation to further his career? It was difficult to say. And where would he find a potion master before the school year was over? It was only four weeks left. Maybe Horace was up to it.

In another part of the castle the real Harry was calling out for his invisible friend.

"Snaky! Snaky, are you here?"

Currently he was walking in the dungeons, and the resident Slytherins where beginning to think it was all some kind of sick joke. Draco cautiously walked up to him.

"Harry, what are you doing?!"

"Hi Drake, since when am I Harry to you?"

"Potter then, now what is it?"

"I'm looking for my invisible friend, the one you don't believe in."

"And you named her Snaky?"

"I didn't, she choose a name herself."

"And why would she be here?"

"She lives in the walls, she could be down here, I decided to wait with the towers until I knew for sure that she wasn't down here."

"What is so important that you have to come here to look for her then?"

"I found I diary, and it might be the one her master lives in, I promised her to bring all diary's I found. I promised."

"A diary you say… May I see it?"

Draco dragged Harry with him inside a abandoned classroom before the boy had a chance to protest, he waited impatiently for the diary to appear.

"Here it is…"

"Damn…" Draco didn't need a very good look to realize what diary it was.

"That's my father's diary."

"Really, how odd. It's empty you know."

"It is?"

"Yeah, look. We could try writing in it, a message to him, to keep it safe."

"I'm not sure he would appreciate it."

"Then he shouldn't have lost it. Do you have a pen or something?"

Draco dug out a quill from a pocket in his robe. Harry proceeded to write the message.

Then both of them saw how the ink disappeared. It simply sunk into the pages.

"There is something wrong with this quill Drake."

"It's the book you buffoon."

A message scribbled itself unto the page out of nowhere.

"_Where am I?_"

"Look Drake, Look! It must be Snaky's master!"

"Potter, Harry. Don't talk to things like this…"

Harry ignored Draco in favour of writing back to the book.

"_Are you Snaky's master? She's the one that lives in the walls._"

"Harry, I hardly believe…"

"_You have met Snaky?_"

"See? She is real!"

"_We've only talked so far. I didn't know she could be removed from the walls._"

Draco was stunned, he decided to watch the happenings quietly.

"_She doesn't live in the walls, but in the pipes. How is it that she can hear you? Are we related?_"

"_I don't even know who you are, but I simply talk to her, and she answers._"

"_I can show you what she looks like, if you want._"

"_Ok._"

A bright light, originating from the pages, swallowed the boys. When they came to, the where in a great hall, not THE great hall, but A great hall. It was damp, dark and an ugly face covered an entire wall. A young man was standing in front of the statue. He was saying something, but only one of the boys understood its meaning.

"That's so corny…"

"He's a parselmouth, and you think it's corny?"

"Parselmouth? No I meant the Slytherin greatest thingy. That's so… predictable. If Slytherin really did this, I'm sure he would have been sneakier."

"What are you talking about?"

At that moment a giant Snake came out of the statue, neither of the two had paid any attention to the statue for the few moments it took to open it, so they where a bit surprised.

"Snaky? You're a lot bigger then I thought! There is no way I can sneak you in to my house, even Petunia won't miss this…"

"You where going to…"

Suddenly a button appeared. It was placed on the floor, right in front of the two.

"Oh, I missed them! It's been ages…"

Harry bent down and pressed the button. The world shattered around them, and they where back in the real world. On the floor, where Harry had dropped the diary, was now another book. It was a children's' picture book, and the pictures was of different rodents. It was very suiting for a snake.

"Maybe Snaky won't recognize this…"

"Just put it away Potter, I don't even want to see it anymore."

"I guess."

Harry put the book in his pocket, it was rather small.

On the other side of the door Marcus Flint was standing. He had seen that Malfoy brat drag the Gryffindor maniac into this room, and had decided that it was in his best interest to eavesdrop. What he had heard had shocked him to the core.

Sometimes earlier:

_Marcus had put his ear to the door, making out a few words._

"_Here it is…"_

"_Damn…"_

_What in the world where they talking about? He looked around himself, seeing no one he continued to listen at the conversation. It would be best if no one saw him._

"_Really, how odd. It's empty you know."_

"_It is?"_

"_Yeah, look. We could try writing…"_

_Now, this was even more confusing. He stood back and used one nifty little charm his mother had taught him and the conversation inside was heard clearly._

"_**There is something wrong with this quill Drake."**_

_Marcus coughed, and drowned the next words, where they… But surely they where too young? Twelve or something. It couldn't be…_

"_**Look Drake, Look! It must be Snaky's master!"**_

"_**Potter, Harry. Don't talk to things like this…"**_

_Impossible! A Malfoy and a Potter? And at twelve no less. But then again, why else would Malfoy hang around with those blood traitors? This could explain everything! Besides, Malfoy's father was a little weird wasn't he? It must come from there._

"_**Harry, I hardly believe…"**_

"_**See? She is real!"**_

_Marcus stood still, the only sound coming from the room in the next few minutes was something small falling to the floor. His mind was reeling with the implications of what he had heard. If this where to reach the press…_

_They where talking again!_

"_**Maybe Snaky won't recognize this…"**_

"_**Just put it away Potter, I don't even want to see it anymore."**_

"_**I guess."**_

_What the ****!__!!_

At present time:

The door opened, and a red faced Marcus Flint met Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter.

"Hi. Potter, Malfoy."

"Flint."

"Who are you?"

"…"

"So."

"What were you doing Flint?"

"Nothing. Nothing at all, you had a good time I guess?"

"What's he talking about Drake?"

"I'm not sure we want to know."

"I'll just be going then, maybe you two should tone it done for a few years right?"

"Oh my god, what do you think we where doing Flint?"

But Marcus had already disappeared from view. Draco realized that this wouldn't help his reputation at all. And he had no clue as how to fix it.

"I hate you Potter."

"You always say that Drake. So, what was he talking about?"

Not until three weeks later did Harry hear from his friend, Snaky.

She wasn't pleased, not at all. Her master had been turned into a picture book, with unmoving pictures none the less! It was a disgrace. And the one responsible, well she wasn't sure she wanted to punish him.

"What should I do?"

"I'm sorry Snaky, but…"

"Yesss? The rulesss say I ssould kill you. Rip you apart, blood and gore."

"Um, but… he did mention a possibility of us being related before his transformation."

"But you do not ssmell right little one."

"About that, my mothers relatives are really weird. Maybe they botched up my smell?"

"They might have…"

"And besides, who have to know? If we won't tell anyone…"

"You are right! And then we can purify the world together!"

"I'm not really into that stuff Snaky."

"Not yet youngling."

"So, do I get to live?"

"You may, young masster."

"Thanks Snaky! Do you like buttons? I do."

"I don't believe I have even sseen a button."

"I'm so sorry, I didn't know."

"It mattersss not masster."

"But it does. I promise, if it's the last thing I do, you will see a button."

"How odd, you sseem more ssincere now, then when you killed my other masster."

"Does it matter?"

"I do not know."

"I have to go now. My mandragoras are done, and I can finally make myself a pair of earrings. They'll be cooler than Luna's!"

"May I come with you?"

"Um, can you get to greenhouse two? That's where it is."

"I sshall be on my way!"

"I'll bring a button!"

Harry could say this without lying, on his inkwell a pretty green button had recently appeared, it would be a great first button to see. He wondered how Luna would react when he came to dinner tonight, with prettier earrings than her.

He wanted to go directly towards the greenhouse but there seemed to be some trouble at the second floor so he had to take a detour. Outside the large door to Hogwarts itself Harry met Neville. The boy had dirty hands, and looked a bit tired.

"Going to check up on your plants Harry? Don't forget the earmuffs."

Neville threw a pair to Harry, who caught the in the air.

"Ha, thanks Nev, I always forget!"

"That's what's worrying me."

"I'm not sure how to make earrings out of them with the earmuffs on thought… Neville, can you get them to only scream on command?"

"You're making what? Oh, whatever. Normally I would say no, but yours are behaving rather strange Harry. You didn't give them any of our experimental potions did you?"

"I might have, but they are essentially unchanged."

"If you say so… but, Harry, don't take of the earmuffs before they have closed their mouths. Promise me that."

"Sure, got to go!"

"Bye Harry."

"Oh and Neville? The buttons have returned to me!"

Neville decided that a walk around the lake before dinner wasn't such a bad idea, and altered his course. It might save him some trouble at least.

Harry reached the greenhouse, he saw the silhouette of a giant snake through the glass, and knew that Snaky had gotten there before him. He looked behind him to make sure he wasn't being followed as he entered the greenhouse. The snake's thunderous voice greeted him.

"Little Masster, I'm here. My eyes are closed."

"Why? You can hardly see the button with your eyes closed."

"Indeed not, put it on the floor before me masster, and I sshall sssee it for myself. Turn around ass well masster."

Harry followed the strange instructions; maybe Snaky was really embarrassed about her eyes?

"It iss very pretty masster."

"Isn't it! I've always liked buttons; anything can happen if you press one. It's all mysterious and fun. They make the world a brighter place!"

The snake had to close her eyes quickly as the boy turned back without warning. She decided that she liked buttons as well. She heard him shuffling around in front of her, and asked him what he was doing. He didn't answer. It was as if he hadn't heard her. She was determined to wait until he said something to her, he was an odd master, but he didn't usually ignore her without reason.

Harry had indeed not heard her hissed question; he had adorned the earmuffs and was readying his working space. He would need to teach the mandragoras to be quiet, so they wouldn't kill anyone, and then shrink them somewhat so that he could wear them as earrings. He placed the two pots in front of him and took a firm grip around the leaves of the first one. He pulled it up in one smooth motion, and he could see it screaming at him. The ground shook around him, but he ignored it. He used his other hand to give the plant the universal sign for quiet, a finger in front of the mouth.

The plant calmed down and looked at him with strange brown, planty eyes. Today it was wearing a reindeer costume, it was very cute.

He did the same procedure with the other plant, but it didn't work. The little plant was dressed as a monk, and when he put it down to get a better grip it sat itself on fire. He could see its dying screams. It was sad, but this is what you got from experimental planting.

He shrunk the other plant, the reindeer one, and fastened a little hook. Then he removed the earmuffs. He dug out the contracts he had prepared for the mandragoras and showed the plant what he wanted. It signed on the dotted line, and Harry was ready to adorn his new jewellery.

That was when he realized that he didn't have any holes in his ears.

"I should have known. Snaky, do you have any idea?"

Harry looked to the snake, which had fallen asleep with its mouth open. He saw an especially sharp fang and got an idea himself. Surely she wouldn't mind if he borrowed it?

A quick spell the twins had taught him during one of their sessions delivered the fang to Harry's hand. He brought it to his ear and pierced it. It hurt quite a bit. Spots started to appear before his eyes and then the world turned a familiar black.

Horace Slughorn had agreed to brew the antidote that was required to undo the state of stone that seemed to have struck several people at Hogwarts this term. He was met by the teachers and the headmaster at the gates.

"Hello dear friends! I am sure I would have found my way to your office Albus. No reason to meet me out here. Not that I don't appreciate the welcoming."

"I'm afraid we must be swift today Horace, a few reporters have already tried to enter the perimeter, and we cannot hold them of for long."

"I see, shall we travel to the greenhouse for supplies then?"

"Certainly."

They walked in a brisk phase towards greenhouse two, on the way a small student from Gryffindor house met them, he was a bit rounder but he was otherwise very similar to his late father. A Longbottom, he would bet his name on it.

"Hello there, a Longbottom are you?"

"Hi sir. Who are you then? I'm Neville. Neville Longbottom… like you thought."

"Ha, I am Horace Slughorn! I knew your parents very well child, maybe we could…"

"This isn't the time Horace."

"It seems we have to be on our way Neville, another time perhaps."

"Your not going to the greenhouse, are you professors?"

"Why yes we are, is something amiss?"

"Headmaster, Harry went in there. He said the buttons had returned. It was just ten minutes ago!"

"Oh my, we have to hurry then."

"Harry? Harry Potter?"

"Not now Horace."

They hurried forward, throwing up the doors to the greenhouse.

A giant snake lay dead in the centre; anything else was difficult to pay attention to. The snake was enormous. It was dark green, and its' eyes were closed.

"Is that a…"

"A what? It's a giant snake!"

"Calm down Minerva, do you know what this is Horace?"

"I suppose it might be a Basilisk. Not many other snakes could even get close to its size."

"A Basilisk?!"

"Impossible!"

"I believe the correct term would be improbable."

"Where is Mr Potter?"

They finally managed to focus on other things, and saw the boy lying unconscious a few meters away. He had a fang pierced through one of his ears.

"No! Oh, his parents will never forgive us!"

"Is he dead Albus?"

The headmaster shakily made his way over to the boy and felt his pulse. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and told his colleagues the good news.

"He is alive. His pulse is strong, but I believe we should take him to Poppy."

They gathered the student's belongings and shipped him away to the nurse with his head of house. The others remained, trying to figure out what to do with the corps.

"I could sell it. On the boy's behalf naturally, I have the contacts."

"That might be best Horace."

"And where are the mandragoras?"

"Over here, Neville the dear has taken excellent care of them!"

"Thank you Pomona, I can see they have grown well! Promising child that one!"

"Where did it come from?"

"We will have to ask Mr Potter that question I'm afraid."

"What will we tell the papers?"

"Maybe it was Binns again?"

"Headmaster!"

"Do you have any other ideas Filius?"

"Ha ha. Binns it is. We have written evidence in any case."

In the infirmary Poppy Pomfrey was shocked. A student had been brought in, suffering from basilisk venom poisoning, and was be all accounts recovering without treatment. If this was any normal person they should have been dead seconds after ingesting the poison, and here he was, sleeping peacefully. It was illogical, unreasonable and so utterly like Harry Potter that all she could do was sight and start documenting the process. It was as if he had ingested the antidote even before the poisoning, or as if he was somehow resistant. Perhaps Albus knew what was happening. And hopefully they would have the restorative draught with them for her other patients when they came. A small bug flew out of an opened window.

In the Daily Prophet that evening a shocking tale was reported to the readers.

**The-Boy-Who-Lived saves school from Dark Lord Binns Again!**

Today I, your favourite reporter, was invited by an anonymous student of Hogwarts to take part of some rather sensitive information. Instead, I found that our very own Mr Potter have bested another dark lord!

Throughout the year Dark Lord Binns has commanded a Basilisk to attack students and teachers alike at Hogwarts. We all remember the heartbreaking story of Lucius Malfoy who was petrified on his way to reunite with his brother on Halloween last year.

The Dark Lord Binns plans were thwarted by a twelve year old, his basilisk who had been sent to destroy the mandragoras that would save the previous victims, died by an unknown curse cast by our saviour.

Harry Potter himself was unfortunately unavailable for comment, seeing as he is unconscious in the infirmary after having been poisoned by the basilisk. How the boy survived this time is a mystery for greater mind than this one. We at the Prophet wish him good luck with his boyfriend and in all of his future endeavours.

Indeed, the basilisk brought two young boys together in their fight against darkness. in fact, Lucius own son seems to have fallen for the young saviour and has helped him defeat the gigantic snake. The shock of loosing his father, even if only temporarily, enabled young Draco to cross house borders to set things right. My anonymous source has it in good confidence that the boys' are deeply in love despite their young age.

Another article concerning Hogwarts was also printed in the paper.

**Hogwarts Professor Gilderoy Lockhart lost memory before reuniting!**

Gilderoy Lockhart, DaDA professor at Hogwarts since last year unfortunately lost his memory in an accident right before his brother was de-stoned. Witnesses claim that the professor seemed nervous before the meeting, and decided to cast a light memory charm on himself to calm down, in an unfortunate miscalculation of his own power the spell seemingly erased all of his experiences. The medi-wizards at sankt Mungus where unavailable for comments and the legend's future look dark. Mr Lockhart missing brother has promised through his wife to the public that he will see to it himself; that his brother gets the best treatment available.

Harry woke up to the sound of screaming. After a few moments he could make out the words.

"I HATE YOU!"

_Ah, it must be Drake.__ Wonder what upset him this time?_

"LET ME GO! I'M GOING TO KILL HIM!"

"Mr Malfoy, you will leave the infirmary right now!"

_And that would be madam Pomfrey._

Doors slammed shut and Harry heard Pomfrey muttering to herself.

"Madam?"

"Potter! You're awake!"

She rushed forward and started whipping around with her wand.

"What happened?"

"You were poisoned by a basilisk Mr Potter. Tell me, what do you see in that Malfoy brat?"

"Huh? Malfoy? We're just friends. What's a basilisk?"

"A giant snake. So it's all a misunderstanding? You should get the headmaster to help you recover the situation then. I cannot say I'm not relieved."

"Snaky tried to kill me?!"

"The snake? Yes, I would think so."

"But, we were friends."

"Nonsense Mr Potter, an old associate of mine named Horace has offered to sell the body parts for you. I'm afraid you've gotten a little wealthier."

"You've butchered one of my friends and sold her?!"

"Surely you won't mind?"

"Ahum, How much did I make?"

"That's a surprise."

"Well, I guess it's alright. She was evil and all…"

"That's the spirit."

"Do you know where my things ended up?"

"They will be returned when you are ready to leave Mr Potter."

"Is that today?"

"It is in fact, today. As soon as you have had these potions."

"Oh, they looks like that strange one Fred made when we where making truth serum."

"It's your usual pepperup I'm afraid."

"I see. Well, you can't have everything."

"The headmaster said that the only reason you survived is the brew you received from the Flamel's. It was working as a general antidote against all poisons. The effects are all gone now though. Basilisk venom is extremely potent."

"So I am immune to all poisons?"

"No, you were."

"That is so cool, I have to test it!"

"Mr Potter, listen to me, you were immune, you aren't any longer."

Harry left the infirmary a few hours later, and with his new earring in possession. It was time for the end-of-the-year feast again. Real exiting and all that, Harry looked forward to seeing the look on Luna's face when she saw his earring the most.

In the great hall of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, at the end of the spring turn, the students and teachers had all gathered for a last feast, before returning home for the year. The petrified parties had all returned to where they belonged, after having been un-petrified. And all was seemingly well. Harry Potter was spotted by the headmaster as he sneaked in and took a seat at the Ravenclaw table.

_"Oh well, it might be for the best"_ He thought and gave a little sight. He rouse from his chair and cleared his throat. The great hall quieted.

"Welcome, to another end of the year feast students. Yes, and as always it is time for giving out the house cup, and congratulate the winners of the quidditch cup as well. But, as we have come to know, before any prizes can be awarded there are things to consider."

In his puerperal vision the headmaster saw the head of Gryffindor house shake her head in silent denial. On his other side the potion master and also head of Slytherin house looked very righteous.

"Indeed, a few last minutes points to take care of. I feel that taking care of the good news first is best. The standing for now is as following, in fourth place with three-hundred and seventy-two points is Huffelpuff. A slight drop from last year I see. In third place, with four-hundred and seven points comes Slytherin. Not too shabby. In second place, with four-hundred and thirty-eight points, Gryffindor! Very well done, and at last, in fist place, with two-hundred and forty points Ravenclaw!"

The silence was broken by hundreds of angry voices, all demanding to know what made it possible for Ravenclaw to be in first place, with the least amount of points. Even the teachers seemed a bit more than miffed.

"Now now, don' be upset. I believe in awarding academical results, and the board o governors claim I'm a tad biased. Ha ha, the jolly fellows."

Albus noted that his attempt at calming the crowd didn't really work. Well, he'll just have to justify it then.

"Very well, two-hundred points to Ravenclaw for being such good students this year."

They where grumbeling, but quieted down again.

"And now, for the..."

A screech unlike any other he had ever heard before interrupted his speech. A first year from Ravenclaw was standing up, staring at Harry Potter and shaking her head. She was saying something like; No, they are too cool! But it was hard to hear from the distance. Harry looked pleased.

"... Sad parts. Due to the unfortunate drinking incident involving a certain second year Gryffindor I am forced to disqualify Gryffindors team from this years quidditch cup. We congratulate Slytherin on their victory. And a last statement, on behalf of two of our students, it would seem as if the happy news regarding the engagement of the Potter and Malfoy scions are false, but perhaps it is for the best to wait a few years right?"

Dumbledore chuckled to himself, it had been fun to see the poor Malfoy boy rave about the castle trying to diffuse the rumors that spread like wildfire. But, it could not go on forever. What would the world think of Harry? But then again... could it be worse than the truth? Maybe...

"Er, well... have a good summer then. I'll just be going. Have some planning to to..."

The students watched in confusion as the headmaster left the hall.

The end // Jesagon

by the way, I feel as if I've missed some threads here... maybe someone could .... oh well, please tell me if you notice anything.


	7. Chapter 7

J. owns Harry Potter book series and she earns money from it. (Or so I have assumed) I don't own the idea, and so I'm forced to write this for free, oh woe me…. Don't worry though, it's all good fun!

The Whomping Willow.

The summer was finally over. Not that Harry minded the summer very much, but his pet rat Hedwig had a strange habit getting hurt during the warm months. This year she'd been poisoned when she ate of Harry's food. Harry had immediately decided to test him immunity to poisons, and had spent the rest of the day being sick in the bathroom. He realized that the immunity only remained during the school year and that he would have to test it again at Hogwarts to make sure. A doctor he spoke to after the incident told him to avoid rat poison in the food all the time, but where was the fun in that?

Right now Harry was exited, in his Hogwarts letter he had been informed of that a new train station had been prepared to accept the students, and that the express would be in action once again. He'd be riding a train!

Harry had travelled to Glasgow days earlier, just to be on time. He had stayed at a hotel for a few days even. Sadly, nothing worked in his room any longer. But maybe they had one-time-use televisions, ovens, lamps and the likes? It must be. His aunt had used the one-use phone to tell him some magic people were looking for him. Apparently the ministry was very concerned about him trip to Hogwarts this year.

They needn't worry though, Glasgow was great. There was even a huge black dog in the park that liked to play fetch with Harry. It was following him around like some lost puppy on it's free time. Harry had read a book about it, and learnt that its name was Grim, and that it liked to kill people. But when it had time to spare, it liked to play fetch with Harry. It was also eerily reminiscent of Padfoot's dog form. Or so his chocolate frog card claimed.

Harry walked to the train station. It was just next to the hotel, so flying a broom seemed unnecessary. Not to mention the trouble he might get into if Hogwarts realized he'd borrowed a broom for the summer. It was only to practise, since he wasn't really any good with it.

Ron said he was a natural flier and would make the quiddich team if only he stopped flying backwards. But it was hard, the excitement of not knowing where you were going was so…

But it didn't matter, he entered the station and quickly spotted what could e a wizard.

"Excuse me sir, can you tell me where to find the train?"

"The elderly lady turned around bewildered. She pondered on how to answer…"

"Em, What do you mean? Are you alright?"

"The poor boy must be insane, she decided…"

"Sir?"

A lady in white gently took Harry's shoulder and turned him around.

"Don't bother yourself with him, He's a bit crazy."

"Ok, do you know where the train is then?"

The lady gave him an odd look. A train for London had just arrived to their left. She shooed Harry away and returned to take care of the peculiar man. Harry looked at the couple as he walked forward. By accident he entered the invisible entryway to the magical train. A vague thought in the back of his head wondered why they made it exactly the same as the last one. There must be better ways. Harry just made it onto the train, and it left as he started to look for his friends. He was at the very front of the train, and so his search took a while. He looked into every compartment, opening the door, seeing all kinds of people in all kinds of situations. It was a bit embarrassing. The lady with the trolley came by, and Harry took a break to eat some chocolate frogs. He got another copy of "Roderick's rodent" as the man was nicknamed.

Then the train started to slow. Harry couldn't believe he'd spent the entire trip in the hallway.

People dressed in black cloaks came in once the train had stopped completely, Harry didn't blame them, the cold winds that came with them indicated a very early winter and these people certainly wasn't dressed for it. The closer they got to him, the colder it got. Harry wondered if he should move out of the way as he munched on his chocolate.

One of the stopped before him and stretched out a rotten looking hand. Harry was a bit puzzled but gave it a chocolate frog anyway. The man, or whatever it was, pulled back. It turned around and entered an empty compartment. Harry followed and tried to give it the chocolate again. It didn't like it very much, and Harry closed the door to leave the poor soul alone. Soon the train started to go again; in all the confusion all the other black clothed people had disappeared. It took Harry quite some time to find his friends; they were in the last compartment. When they arrived in Hogsmede it was discovered that all doors in the entire train had somehow broken. The students had to climb out through the windows. A lone Dementor was spotted in one of the compartments, fleeing in circles from a small, but energised chocolate frog.

A few months later.

Harry, Hermione and Ron was returning from Hagrid's hut, Ron was carrying Binns Jr that had returned from the dead just a few minutes earlier.

"Calm down Binns Jr," the rat was doing it's best to escape the redhead's clutches, "Hermione promised to make sure Mr. Decent stays in her dorm so you'll have nothing to worry about anymore!"

"Honestly Herm, how could you name your cat Mr. Decent?"

"Oh please, it's been what, a year? Just get over it."

Harry wasn't listening to his two friends bickering, he was instead watching with great interest as a big black dog was emerging from under the Whomping willow. It reminded him of the seven other black dogs he'd seen this term, only this time the dog managed to use a wooden stick to press on something at the root of the tree. Seeing as the action calmed the tree down it managed to get out of reach in one piece.

Harry immediately wanted to see what it was the dog had pressed and changed his course towards the tree. His friends continued towards the school, and the dog ran past Harry just a minute after. Then it ran past again, dragging Ron with it. He herd Hermione call out in distress and realized the dog would get to the tree before he did if he didn't hurry. He ran.

Right past the dog, who stopped in confusion. Hermione was quiet again, and then he reached the tree. Behind him the Dog stared at him, so did both of his friends.

He saw the wooden stick the dog had used and picked it up. At this distance the tree ignored him. He looked at the roots, trying to identify what could have calmed the tree. He saw a knot of some kind; it looked a little scratched at if many people had pressed on it. It was obviously a trap, you'd press the knot and the tree would kill you. As if anyone would have a secret button that obvious, what did they take him for? A bit to the right of the knot there was a mysterious button, it was brilliantly yellow and shone in the fast approaching night. He couldn't really remember ever seeing it before, so it must be the real hidden button.

Meters away Hermione and Ron saw the Yellow button come into existence before their eyes, so did the dog who didn't believe its eyes. After the first moment of confusion they both realized what it meant.

"NOOO!"

"HARRY, DON'T PRESS IT!!!"

But then, since when had Harry listened to any of them? He pressed the button.

The button stopped shining, and then a timer blinked into existence on the trunk.

One minute was the time they were given.

Harry went forward, to search for the secret gateway that must have been there, but was stopped by the tree which hadn't calmed one tiny bit. He nearly died, but managed to duck the second strike. His first thought when he saw the timer was that he would lose this round. He had no idea when the tree had taken up boxing, but figured that if he lost the practise matches against Dudley he really didn't have a shot in this one. He turned around and ran, hoping that the tree wasn't a strong runner.

Hermione and Ron had decided to run the moment the timer appeared, thinking that usually they weren't as fortunate and dreading what it meant when Harry's weird magic felt the need to give them time to run. The mysterious dog followed them while looking a bit lost.

They met their DADA professor outside the door to the school; he was looking at the dog and reaching for his wand. Harry got there just then, and his bloodied arm shook him out of his stupor.

"Harry, did he hurt you?!"

Harry looked at the professor in surprise, but shook his head no. "It was the boxing tree…"

The other stared at him, and was about to comment, but right then something exploded.

That is to say, they thought something exploded at first. The sound was deafening and the ground shook beneath them. As they fell to the ground most of them hoped that no debris would kill them. As it turned out, when they opened their eyes again, it really wasn't a risk. The tree hadn't exploded; it had imploded, together with most of the surrounding terrain. Where it had once stood was now a crater the size of Greenhouse 3. In the middle of the crater was a pink horse. At first glance they would have claimed that it was a little toy pony, but it wasn't. It looked around a bit disorientated and then started towards the forbidden forest.

Remus Lupin was feeling… something. It was a mix of rage, outrage, shock and many other feelings, and he didn't know what to do. He searched around for the root of his anger to stay sane, but stopped when he spotted someone who was said to be dead. Peter Pettigrew. It would seem as if both of the animaguses around had reverted out of shock.

Peter looked at the crater and didn't seem to notice anything else. That lasted until the main doors opened and more then half of the student body went outside.

Silence spread rapidly in the crowd, a surprising amount of people then recognised Peter. (Remus had a photograph in the classroom and spent at least one lesson with every class to talk about the whys' and whats' of the Potter tragedy. As suggested by his therapist.) Then the whisperings started, Peter who had attained some of his animagus abilities, good hearing, understood that it was time to scram. He changed into his rat form, regretting it moments afterwards when he realized what he just revealed, and managed to escape to spell showers that slammed into the grass outside Hogwarts.

The students had been stupefied when the supposedly dead hero had turned up in front of them. When professor Lupin started to try and hex the man they all thought it was an impostor and decided to help catching him. Later at dinner they where told the truth, and witnessed as Sirius Black was pardoned by the minister himself.

Somewhere in-between the visit to Pomfrey and the appearance of Sirius Black, Harry managed to get out of whatever punishment he should have gotten for imploding the old tree.

In the forbidden forest a pink pony was adopted by a unicorn who had lost its' foal two years ago. It was very happy, and had decided to get a horn as well.

**The End.**

More or less…. A few days later thought…

"Hey, Kiddo… I've been thinking."

"Are you serious?"

"Heh, am I not always?"

"Ha ha, don't listen on him when he acts like this Harry."

"Ok Remus."

"Wha… but… Remus, you've ruined him!"

"What have you been thinking about Sirius?"

"Well, you've taken everything that's happened very well and I was just wondering how you could possibly know what colours my favourite underwear is."

"Sirius, what exactly have you been talking about when I was away?"

"I asked him what he knew about me and well, us, the Marauders."

"Harry?"

"Um, I have all of your cards. From the chocolate frogs you know. It's a bit strange really, I can't seem to get any other ones, just the four marauders and someone called Snivellus."

"You have them?!"

"We thought we'd been discovered! Do you realize what this means Mooney?!"

"Not really no…"

"It means James was right, it is an automated device! There is nobody working in that chocolate factory! And if Lily ever had found out what we did…"

"What did you do?"

"Wouldn't you like to know little Prongslet? Not to worry, your uncle Padfoot will tell you all about it. But not today, today we'll take it further! After all, you don't have a card yet, do you Harry?"

"Sirius, I'm not sure this is a good idea. You just got out of prison, and Fudge is on a warpath."

"Chill out Moony! Nothing could go wrong. So Harry, what's your animagus form?"

"I think I'm a human."

"You mean you haven't changed yet?"

"I mean what you say, Padfoot. No reason to be rude."

"You mean what… anyway; first I'm going to dig out this book for you."


	8. Chapter 8

As the original author of Harry Potter, all characters belong to her. J K Rowling. We are grateful, many of us at least. So grateful in fact that we decide to further her efforts and use the inspiration she provides to make this. Fan fiction! We do it for free because we love it!

Wee wee, don't sue me wee… And I at least am grateful for all my fellow fan fiction authors, who also inspire me a lot. Have a grate day you all!!!

The Brother Wand

It was time. The last of the challenges was about to start. Harry had had a lot of fun in the competition. First there had been a dragon. You had to steal a golden egg from it. He had been second out and faced off against a fireball red or something. Truthfully, it had been over so fast he hadn't gotten a very good look at the beast at all. He could still remember the elated feeling as he stepped out on the field and saw a rocky landscape filled with buttons of every colour of the rainbow. Sadly he didn't remember much after that. No one did. The department of mysteries had been called in and the investigation was still ongoing. The dragon had yet to be found.

The second task was a bit of a misunderstanding. Apparently you where supposed to rescue someone important from the bottom of the lake. Harry though, had accidentally destroyed the golden egg with the clue when he found a button on it one day and, was completely clueless. He hadn't even shown up at the lake during the day of the competition. It was also noted by the other contestants that there wasn't any hostage left when it was all over.

Harry had spent the day in the girls' bathroom on the second floor. The pipe to the chamber of secret made an amazing chute!

In secret, Dumbledore discovered that Harry had managed to get himself disqualified by destroying the egg, and should have lost his magic as a result but hadn't (and he still couldn't understand how it was that this hadn't happened), but kept it quiet.

This meant that Harry was about to enter the last task against all rules. Dumbledore was the only one who knew, but thought it would be a good experience for the boy who had the fate of the world on his shoulders. If he knew what his decision would cost people he might have thought differently.

Harry was in last place in the competition. Not very surprising… but a little, since he shouldn't have had a place at all. Either way, he was to be the last to enter the maze in front of them all. Krum and Delacour had entered first, at the same time. Diggory was off any moment now. Two minutes later and Harry was about to enter. He did. And stumbled on a piece of grass that was growing everywhere. His fall caused his to evade a strange golden arrow that was made of magic and was meant to remove his magical core. The arrow flew over him and hit Mad Eye Moody straight on. The professor fainted with a pained scream.

Then the bushes closed behind the young rule breaker.

On the magical screens that had been created to show the audience how it went for their contestant a cruel tail enfolded. Three golden arrows hit the three leading parties and robbed them of their magic. The reason for this was the broken magical contract of course. The only one who was still in the maze with humanity and magic intact was Harry. Sadly the magic in the competition would never accept him as the winner so it shut down. The walls started to sink in to the ground, starting with the ones closest to the centre.

Harry noticed none of this as he slowly made his way through the maze. He did notice when he suddenly without any effort what so ever could see the trophy over the hedges to his left. Looking around confusedly and seeing a giant spider in the other direction coming his way he decided to take the easy way. He jumped over the slowly receding hedges and made it to the trophy in mere minutes after having entered. _"Well, this wasn't so bad…" _He thought as clasped the prize in his hand and disappeared.

People in the crowd had started to panic as Moody started to scream. What they saw on the screen made they fall silent in shock. Dumbledore himself couldn't comprehend what he was seeing. And as Harry disappeared with the trophy he sat down hard. The teachers that managed to keep their heads had gone into the decreasingly maze-like maze to rescue the newly made squibs.

Harry landed at a graveyard. He might not have realized it, but it still was.

It was a bit chilly and darkness was still hours away. There wasn't a cloud on the sky so the sight was very good. A wizard was pointing at him with a wand, and, was that a penny?

Harry avoided his fate yet again by reaching down to see. It wasn't a penny.

Next thing he knew he was tied to a tombstone while Peter Pettigrew prepared some dark ritual or whatnot by the fire. The little Dark Lord in baby form, which Harry wrongfully assumed was Voldemort's mini-me, was laughing crazily. Harry found it slightly unnerving and looked to Peter for something more, well normal. Peter cut of his left foot and put it in the cauldron. He bled a lot. Harry looked down at himself instead. He then saw a little button on the tombstone. A little voice in his head told him that if he pressed it he would end up in pain, but a glance at Peter who was jumping his way on his only foot made the decision for him.

The tombstone exploded. Debris flew everywhere and Harry was in pain. Some of the rocks with his blood on them landed in the cauldron, while other rocks made the same cauldron tip over. Voldemort baby-model was drenched. Harry watched in horrid fascination as the little one started to change. The potion soaked up through the skin of the baby and caused it to grow. Most of it had uselessly ended up on the ground though so when the growing stopped Voldemort was a lot more like a mini-me then ever before. He looked a bit snakeish, with pale skin, no hair, flat nose and somewhat prominent nostrils. He was evenly proportioned and had the built of a grown up, since he didn't have any cloths at the moment Harry looked the other way. It was the nice thing to do after all. Besides, since the man was only 20 inches or so tall he had some major trouble keeping his laughter in check.

He stood up shakily, blood was dripping from his back were many small stones had left their marks. He saw a wand on the ground and picked it up. It wasn't his wand, so he used it to summon his own. Strangely enough the wand felt really easy to use. He was almost sure that it would be a good match to him. Then it hit him, this must be Voldemorts' wand! Ollivander had told him that they had brother wands… not that he knew what that meant but… He looked at the little man who now wore black robes that was just a bit enormous on him. Harry pondered a few moments if the course of action he was about to take was really that great, he knew Hermione always told him to do the absolute opposite of what he had thought out, but this was a nice thing to do, wasn't it?

"Hm hm, Voldemort?"

"Ye_ss?_" the dark lord asked. He didn't look that happy…

"I got your wand here; I thought you'd want it back." With those words he threw the wand to its owner and summoned the trophy to his hands. And again he disappeared.

Voldemort stared at the place the boy had stood at moments ago in shock.

"_And they call me insane"_

He then picked up his wand and looked it over carefully. His body might not have turned out exactly the way he had planned, but he was no longer defenceless. He spotted a small imperfection near the bottom of the wand. He peered into the newly found hole and thought he saw a button of the bright green kind. An unexplainable desire to press it took hold of him and he transfigured a rock into a needle so that he could. When it was done the wand cracked. The wood shattered and a phoenix flew up and out. It was eerily reminiscent of Fawkes, the only other phoenix he had seen before. Even the third feather from the tip on the right wing that he had cursed purple in his youth was the same. Purple… was it coincident? Then he remembered his wand.

"Noooo, Wormtail. We Will Kill That Boy Now!!! Give me your arm."

"Master? But… my foot. You promised…"

"Harry!"

Harry had returned to the place of the third task. He looked around himself in amazement, it was utter chaos. Ron reached him then, and took hold of his arms to try and assess the damage. Seeing all the blood did little to appease the boy though.

"What happened? Is your magic still there?"

"Yeah, of course its' there. Shouldn't it be?"

"Man, you have no idea what you missed! It's terrible!"

Harry didn't think Ron looked that devastated, but whatever. Dumbledore then came out of nowhere, or the crowd (whichever you prefer).

"Harry, are you alright?"

"More or less, I blew up a tombstone and then I accidentally brought back Voldemort at the same time… I kind of panicked after Peter cut of his foot, sorry. Actually, now when I think of it, I'm in pain."

"You what?" Dumbledore said weakly. He had thought it was bad when the contestants turned squibs, and had been rather relieved to hear that Harry still blew things up with his magic, but then it sank in what the boy actually said.

Ron was staring at his best friend, shocked at the levels of stupidity he reached after only a few minutes away from the people who did their best to keep him in line. He wanted to tell him that this was bad, but refrained. Harry didn't see things the way normal people did.

A fire erupted in the air above them. Fawkes emerged. He landed on Harry's offered arm. Then the bird thrilled at his replica on Dumbledore's shoulder.

"Where did you come from? Well, no matter. I'm sorry to tell you this but I've already got a pet bird. Her name is Fraugty, she's a dove. But my friend Ronald here might take you in."

Harry gave him a pointed look. And Ron quickly agreed. The bird flew over and perked on his shoulder instead.

"Harry, I'm almost afraid to ask but, when did you get a dove?"

"I was in London buying my school supplies last summer when I met her. She looked at me that special way you know… and I just knew she was mine. She still lives in London though, She's a real city girl that one."

Dumbledore walked away without a word, shaking his head sadly.

The End.


	9. Chapter 9

It's time. Time to complain. I don't own any characters, nor do I own any specific places. Ask yourself, can you really own anything outside your own mind? Well, whatever the answer may be I don't earn anything by writing this in this day and age. Don't sue me. Be grateful for J K Rowling who wrote the Harry Potter books that made this fan fiction possible. And while you're at it, be somewhat grateful to me for writing at all, and for all other authors and other artists out there. And the rest of the creation we know as the universe. If it is a creation…. Whatever.

The Talk.

Dumbledore had sent an owl to Harry several days ago requesting the meeting that was soon to commence. Harry had fretted since the moment he received the note. Dumbledore had written; it's time for the talk. Meet me this Friday in my office after classes.

Harry had heard awful things about **The Talk**. And really, he knew those things… birds and horses right? Babies grew in laboratories, so had the TV claimed that one time so long ago…

The situation would never have occurred if Albus had been a little more in contact with the times and the muggle world. But you can't have everything.

Harry walked slowly out of potions. He had tried everything he could think of to make the class last as long as possible, and when it was over he tried to stay as long as he could in the classroom. He was the first one out. There was more then half the lesson time left.

Who ever would have thought that his intense focus and shifting of ingredients to make a mess on purpose would lead to a major breakthrough within potion making? There was from this day forward a solution called Presto, which halved the stirring time with all potions. Oh well, it obviously wasn't his day. Snape had even chosen to reward him by allowing him to leave class before the bell rung. Great, he didn't even receive points. And his entire potion kit was being confiscated…

Now there was only the Meeting to look forward too. He walked as slowly as he could. He stumbled on one of the armours on purpose so that he could be delayed. It sort of fell, but then caught itself and revealed a secret entrance. Feeling just a bit exited at the new find he entered and walked in normal speed for the suspiciously short length of secret corridor. When he then stepped out of a stone arc that was reversible and noticed that he had ended up just inside the headmaster's stairwell he stopped and banged his head to the wall a few time.

This really wasn't his day. Or it really was… who knows?

In his office Dumbledore was writing in his candy journal. _Today I have eaten candy_. It had been a free gift at the ACA, Anonymous Candy Addicts, meeting he was forced to attend. It had all started with a sudden need for sugar on a vacation to muggle candy factories. He had forgotten to bring his own, and had proceeded to rob the place. He had apologised and all, but he really wasn't such a good person when low on sugar. That was why he didn't stop eating sweets. People sometimes thought he was being overly dramatic about it, but really, last time someone refused to give him candy for an extended period of time he had killed that person. It had been his best friend, who went by the name Gellert Grindelwald, and by some stroke of luck it turned out he was a dark lord so no one pressed charges. Not that he would ever tell anyone the real reason Grindelwald died, if he did he would probably lose his job. And besides, wasn't it punishment enough that he had to live with the knowledge of the murder?

Suddenly there was a knock on the door, and it opened before he had the chance to say anything. It was a great shock for the both of them. Albus hadn't had unexpected guests in the last sixty years, since the griffin always informed him of who came and went, and Harry had never seen an old man have a heart attack before. Luckily for Dumbledore he fell on one of his little silver instruments and it gave him such a jolt that his heart started beating again.

The instrument was ruined though, which had to be kept secret at all costs. He had borrowed that one from the ministry, it was meant to check any magic cast at number four privet drive Surrey. If Harry ever found out it was gone… but he wouldn't.

"Harry!" *cough* *cough*

"Headmaster… is this really necessary? I saw it on TV a few years ago you know."

"You what?! But how can they have found out? And they are only muggles surly not…"

"Err, Sir, muggles reproduce as well."

"Reproduce? What are you talking about my boy?"

Harry didn't answer; instead he sat down in a comfy chair and pretended he hadn't spoken a word since entering the office. He was also beet red.

Dumbledore looked at him suspiciously before he sat down carefully in his own chair. He took a piece of candy from the bowl on his desk, like always when he felt a bit homicidal.

"Harry, last year you brought back the dark lord. I figured it was time you knew the whole prophesy." He used his stern voice.

"There's a prediction?"

"_I knew I had forgotten something."_ "There is."

"Well, as long as you're aware of that I don't believe in fate."

At this point the headmaster began to wonder what he ever did to deserve this student, hadn't he done everything possible to make the child listen to him? He explained about the prophesy to Harry, and that it didn't matter whether he believed in it or not. If the dark lord did, he would come after him. He'd thought he'd finish of with a flourish, and tried to with a few well selected words.

"The power you hold my boy, the power the dark lord cannot understand and thus do not know, do you know what it is? I imagine you do not. It is love Harry. When Lily sacrificed herself for you her love left a mark on you, a mark that will always be there, almost as if it was a layer of skin that protects you from harm."

Harry was staring at him.

"I see that you do not believe me, but it is the simple truth."

"I don't mean to be rude or anything, but while you told me about this prophesy thing I thought it was pretty obvious what my power is."

"Oh, do tell."

"Well, I, Hermione and Ron have been talking about this problem during the summer holiday and…"

"But you didn't find out about it until a few minutes ago."

"Not the prophesy thing, the dark lord. We figured he was after me and has been for some years now, but I always manage to escape through some weird happenings. The thing is I have no control over it, and that needed to be corrected."

"I'm afraid I'm not quite following."

"Surely you have noticed it headmaster. Even Luna did."

"You cannot mean to…"

"I already have. I've created a spell to make them."

"Harry…"

"I can make buttons everywhere! Wha ha ha ha ha!"

Harry got out of his chair and left for an unknown destination.

"Oh no, what has he done. Fawks, have we lost another one?"

The majestic bird remained silent but its' eyes were sad. Albus sighted deeply, and started planning for the fall of the next dark lord. The question was who would be willing to get rid of a major source of Entertainment. The current students were all lost to the fun lovers…

Later that evening in Gryffindor common room a chess tournament was taking place. Ron was banned from it, it was a yearly tradition and when Ron won in his first year they decided on a new rule. No previous winners allowed. It wouldn't have come to this is the poor boy had simply won. But since it had been a downright slaughter that year, some of the sixth years still had nightmares from the carnage, the rule was a necessary evil. Another rule was put into place at the same time; it was no longer allowed to charm the pieces to bleed. Ron still claimed that it was the blood that caused the nightmares and not his strategy but Harry didn't believe him. After all, he had never won a game between the two of them.

The current crowd gatherer was the game in-between Harry and Hermione. Not because of the excellently preformed manoeuvres, that just wasn't there, but because of the discussion that was taking place.

"So it wasn't about birds and bees then?"

"I thought it was horses? But no it wasn't"

"Maybe someone should have that conversation with you Harry."

"It's not necessary I tell you, I've seen it on the telly years ago. All about test tubes and small needles, then you put the babies inside the mothers…"

People were staring at the poor boy, but he didn't notice.

"Harry… *sight* what did you talk about then?"

"Just things, it seems as if I'm the only one that can off Voldemort if we let some prophesy decide what to do. Headmaster was trying to make me believe that love is a special power. I think it's quite obviously not. Buttons are."

"You told him?! Have you even tested it yet?"

"Well see how well it works tomorrow morning. Look at the staff table."

"Sorry for interrupting, but what are you on about?"

"Hi Gred, it's a new spell I made. It creates buttons, I'm going to defeat Voldemort with it."

"But don't you usually create buttons without the spell? It seems a bit unnecessary to do a spell for something that happens anyway, doesn't it?"

"Well, now everyone can do it! Not just me. Want to learn?"

"…"

"You're my favourite fake brother you know."

"I can't learn, Fawkon will kill me if I do."

"Oh please Ron, what can one little phoenix do?"

"You don't want to know."

**The End.**

Which raises the question, how did Harry create the great spell? I was thinking, and I decided all by my lonesome to write it down, just for you guys. (Whoever you are…) But before that, a slight morning after.

**The morning after.**

Hermione Granger had become resign with the fact that her dubious friend Harry Potter was more then likely to ask one Luna Lovegood to marry him. She had seen all the signs, the need to impress the lady, the way he sought out her company and many other little details that formed her theory. And she was somewhat glad for them, truthfully they were both good people, but a frightening image of their future children disturbed her feelings of well wishing for them. That, and the nagging worry she held that Luna might not treat Harry in the best of ways. Harry needed the best after all; he was her friend more so than Luna ever was.

This was the reason she approached the Ravenclaw table at breakfast, to speak some sense into the girl. Make her understand that she would have to treat Harry with respect even if she didn't feel like he deserved it. He could be rather taxing at times.

She slid into a seat opposite of Luna, and greeted her for the day, as she plucked her breakfast from the assorted dishes on the table.

"Did you want to ask me something, Hermione Granger?"

Luna wasn't even looking at her as she asked the question, instead choosing to focus her gaze at the head table. It instantly reminded Hermione of something Harry had said the previous day, but for the life of her she couldn't remember what it was. She shook of the disturbing feeling and turned back towards Luna.

"It's about Harry."

"Isn't it always?"

"Is it? I haven't thought about it."

"It is. You refuse to talk about the crumbled horned…"

"Anyway, as I was saying."

"About Harry."

"Right, if he asks you to marry him…"

"I'd say no."

"… and after you've said yes…"

"Won't happen."

"…then you'll have to, WHAT?"

"Really Hermione…"

Luna tore her gaze from the head table who had disappeared in a cloud of smoke, and looked Hermione in the eyes.

"…I could never marry a man with a prettier earring than me, you should know that."

"But, you're perfect for each other."

"We are not. Can you imagine how the crumble horned…"

"What does it got to do with any of this?"

"Why in the world do you think I've been looking for it? I intent to marry it of course. It is the perfect mate after all. I even promised Harry, that if the first specimen we found is a female, he can take it out on a date first."

"The first…"

"I don't care much if it is male or female, that's what magic is for after all."

"But, it's an animal, isn't it? It's not right…"

"An animal? Did Harry try to trick you again? Crumble horned is a family name. I'm looking for a very rare family of people. They're very good at hiding. But daddy promised me the perfect mate when I was little and we have been searching for him or her ever since. They are legendary! You could ask anyone."

"But I thought… And what about all the other things you talk about?"

"Just because the world we live in choose to ignore them doesn't meant they don't exist. Most of them simply live in the infrared spectrum. Have you heard of it? Even the muggles know about energy levels and wavelengths…"

"I have to talk to Ron, buy Luna."

Hermione hurried towards the Gryffindor table, spotting Ron she quickly took a seat nearby.

"Ron!"

"Hermione, did you see that, it was hilarious!"

"Not now Ron, this is important."

"You missed it? I can't believe it, the first time ever the teachers…"

"Ron! Luna, and all those creatures… are they real?"

"Oh those… well, they exist and all that, but it's not like they make any difference. Not many people bother to gather knowledge about something that can't affect the ordinary world…"

"So all this time Luna's been telling the truth?"

"I guess, but she's a bit loony you know, memorizing all that unnecessary stuff."

"I can't believe it… and crumble horned…"

"That is just a fairy tale. Everyone knows they're not real! So what if they claim the ministry have a hidden family tree somewhere, no one seen any proof for like, a hundred years."

"And why are they so special?"

Ron blushed quite a bit as he answered.

"Um, that is, they are said to be very good… at the marriage part thing…"

"You mean…?"

"Yeah, their cooking is supposed to be unparalleled."

"RON! Don't mislead me!"

"What did you think I was talking about?"

"Oh nothing, forget it. You know something?"

"What?"

"Didn't Harry say he knew how to cook? Why would he need to marry someone that was good at it as well?"

"Hermione, you know Harry. Do you actually believe him when he claims he knows cooking? He also mentioned that his relatives wouldn't eat anything he had touched for any reason."

"I didn't really consider it. But Ron, those creatures, I haven't found any reference to them anywhere. At all, isn't that a bit strange?"

"Erm, Herm, they have their own science paper? Have you herd about the Quibbler? It's like, the top of the line news on resent discoveries… maybe you should read it sometimes?"

"My world image is destroyed. So utterly obliterated…"

"Cheer up, I'll tell you about what happened to the teachers!"

**The Most fantastic and Wonderful Invention in the life of one Harry Potter.**

Harry had escaped the Dursleys'. The rest of the summer was in front of him and his friends were coming over. But not until tomorrow. Right now, he had the remaining Marauders all to himself, and he decided to ask them something he had wondered about for a long time.

"Hey, Paddie?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you know what my first button was?"

"Um, what makes you think that?"

Sirius was flustered and looked everywhere but at Harry.

"You're not a very good liar are you?"

"I am too! It's just… those eyes. Lily's eyes, she could get anyone to confess."

"Oh, so about that button."

"Don't look at me! Stop! Oh alright I'll confess!"

_Padfoot's memory._

_Sirius stepped out of the floo, before him was his best friend James Potter, wielding a camera and looking mightily disappointed._

"_That's so unfair! I'll get you next time."_

"_Humph, not all of us are klutz's when it comes to flooing."_

"_What are you implying?!"_

"_Nothing Prongs, but the truth."_

_They walked into the living room where Lily sat with Harry in her arms. _

"_The contract is on the table you two."_

"_But Lily! I'm his father."_

"_Don't James. Just don't. If you two are going to baby-sit him today you will sign that contract. It's necessary, trust me on this James."_

_Grudgingly the contract was signed. Sirius read it through before signing. No magic? Was all this necessary? Not even for diaper change?!_

_A few minutes later Lily had left, to attend her sister's wedding. The rest of the family wasn't invited. James and Sirius were alone with a baby._

"_Is it really that bad if we use a little bit of magic?"_

"_Better not old friend, she spoke of impressionable magical cores or what not. I was totally gone when she reached the point, but as always with Lily; better safe then sorry."_

"_For you maybe…"_

"And so we babysat you like normal responsible parents the whole day."

"That really doesn't really tell me anything about the button though."

"We're getting there…"

_Sirius was preparing to leave, Lily would be home in a couple of minutes and everything was fine. As a final farewell to his godson he thought a prank would be just perfect._

_He reached out his hand to Harry for a shake, and when little Harry grabbed his hand the magical buzz-button was revealed. The child received a good chock, but took it well and laughed. James saw the whole thing and laughed as well._

_They said their goodbyes and Sirius stood up to leave. He met Lily in the door._

"_Mama! Look!"_

_Little Harry had apparently taken quite a liking to buttons, both in appearances and magic. His first accidental piece of magic created a little yellow button on his mother's favourite shoes. After the boy pushed the button they where gone. Replaced by pretzels. Harry was overjoyed. Lily was not._

"_If I find out that any of you are behind this…"_

"Needless to say, we never told anyone about it. Not even Remus."

"So you're the one… Thank you so much Padfoot!"

"Sure, no worries. Just don't mention it to Lily in the after life kiddo."

Later that summer Harry recalled his strongest memory of his mother, the one were she showed him some wand motions; Hermione helped him come up with a nice word for the spell. Ronald came up with a plan to hide this information from himself so not to anger his temperamental bird. Fawkon didn't like buttons for some reason.

Thus the Button-spell was created.


	10. Chapter 10

**Of Bills and Snitches.**

It was two weeks after the winter holiday. The students that had returned home for Christmas had returned safely and all was mostly good. Four students had gathered in an empty classroom though, all of them up to no good whether they knew it or not. On a table in-between them stood a pensive, belonging to one Albus Dumbledore and 'borrowed' by one Harry Potter. The rest of the castle population was eating lunch in the great hall.

"I'll prove it then." The dark headed boy exclaimed loudly.

The two unconvinced students opposite him, Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley respectively, shook their head in frustration but still dipped a finger each in the silvery liquid together with the other two. Luna Lovegood only smiled lightly as the world started to spin around the four of them.

"_But, you're… You're wrong! You are nothing like I had envisioned you! Luna, you can have her. I d__idn't want… this." Harry turned around abruptly and started to walk away._

"_I told you they where human, Harry." Luna called after the enraged teenager while she picked up the hand Harry had dropped. The poor girl just looked lost._

"_But you said they where special. This is just an ordinary girl!" With those words the boy disappeared out the door, not to be seen for the following three days. _

And then the memory ended. The teens didn't return to the real world though, it seemed as if their esteemed headmaster had a few memories of his own in his pensive. Hermione gestured to Ronald to keep his mouth shut for now as the next memory began to play out before them.

_They found themselves inside a small room, the two figures that belonged to the memory was easily identified as Dum__bledore and their very own divination professor Sibyll Trelawney._

_The two of them were seated at the only table in the room, two cups of what appeared to be tea stood before them and a small platter with biscuits remained untouched to the side. The mumblings from the other parts of the establishment could be heard through the walls._

"_A descendant of the legendary oracle of Higney's Starborn you say?"_

"_Oh yes, it's in my blood! Although I'm a half-blood of course. But it is my firm belief that new blood strengthens the powers of a prophet such as myself."_

"_Naturally."_

"_I think it's a job interview!"_

"_Really Herm? What ever made you think that?"_

"_Oh shush Ron, we don't want to miss anything important."_

_As the words left her lips they saw the future professor stiffen, her eyes rolling back in her head and a scary voice seemingly belonging to many people at the same time emerging from her throat._

"_The one with the…"_

_By now Harry was really bored. He had promised his friends to show them the memory his future self had sent back in time, since they had refused to believe such a thing possible, and had subsequently broken into the headmaster's office, again, to borrow his pensive. Did the old man not realize how hard that was? Not only having to use the strange secret entrance from the dungeons, but also deactivating all kinds of alarms. If he hadn't had his very own button-fix-it-all-machine he didn't know what he would have done. And then he had to go and put all these useless memories in the pensive! Forcing any stray 'borrower' of it to live through them all. And he had been forced to see them twice now. He picked up a marking pen he had found earlier in his trunk and decided to take his revenge straight away. _

_And so the memory-Dumbledore was doodled. An extra set of glasses around his eyes here, a strange duckling on the headmaster's balding head there. After doing some more damage to the historical moment he finished with a signature__ on Albus sleeve. _

'_Harry Potter was here.'_

_At that moment the medium quietened again and the others turned around. Hermione thought she saw something odd in the headmaster's face just before the memory dissolved and they finally were ditched in the real world._

"Harry! Did you hear that? Do you know what this means?"

"We're done! I'll go return it."

The boy disappeared, eerily alike the memory they had viewed earlier, through the door before anyone else had any chance to speak. Luna realized that yet again she had been left with the duty of explaining things to the uninformed. She sighted heavily, this was the reason she seriously considered terminating her acquaintance with one Harry Potter. But then again, she now had proof of their future successes. Was that the real meaning behind this memory that Harry had sent back? Did he know?

"As you saw, Harry has indeed received a message from his future self."

"And lets say it's true, by merely sending it back he changes the future, therefore creating a paradox that would shake the foundations of our reality! Even if it was possible, actually sending something back in time, even a memory, would be highly irresponsible."

"But I and Harry will make sure the future remain as it is, and will be. We're not stupid after all. If you just think about it, you would realize that Harry wouldn't send anything back unless he already knew it would happen."

"But… but, wait! That's not the issue here. Did you hear the prophecy? Surely you heard?"

"I don't believe in a set future, so I didn't really pay attention."

"Wait, Luna, that makes no sense."

"Ron, I'm not sure why we bother."

"Hey! Do you think this was the prophecy Dumbledore told Harry about before?"

"Oh my God! Why didn't I think of that?! It was that stupid game…"

"It's too bad Harry never removed his memory from the pensive."

"Luna?"

"He went to return it to the headmaster, right? But he left the memory in it. I'm guessing someone will notice it sooner or later."

***

That very same night the headmaster did notice the intrusion in his office. It was a mixture of different circumstances that led to the discovery. At first, a mysterious doorway leading to his stairwell stood open when he arrived after dinner. When he reached the office proper a small machine with a single button on it was stuck in the wards, preventing their higher functions but not destroying them. Starting to get a very clear image of who could have been here, and at the same time refusing to attach the accomplishment to the concerned student, made him step wearily towards his pensive that was for some reason situated on the desk. After casting a few detection charms and discovering nothing out of the ordinary he decided to watch the memories in the bowl.

The memory showed a slightly older Harry talking to the Ravenclaw student Luna Lovegood, another odd bird he'd been told. Another girl was there as well, the whole situation was very confusing. After the memory ended the Headmaster started to ponder on how Harry had managed to construct a memory like this, he could have used aging potions supposedly, but with the frightening displays he and the Longbottom scion created during classes he doubted it. And further, for what reason had he broken in into his office to plant the memory? It was all very irregular.

Another memory had been playing for a short while, a more familiar one but just as problematic. Suddenly something unexpected happened though. On his own memory-self's face, markings started to appear. The old man watched in horrid fascination how the doodles spread, and ended with the signature 'Harry Potter was here'. It was suddenly very apparent to the headmaster that someone was framing the poor boy. Someone who wasn't very good at spelling their appearances to the right age, but was skilled enough to tamper with a pensive memory. The saddest part was that it wouldn't be corrigible, now when he had viewed the faulted memory, the changes would be transferred to the real one itself. Hopefully no one would ever need to see this.

***

At breakfast the morning after the incident the students had gathered as usual for their morning meal. Conversations flowed at a steady phase around the hall, and so also with a small group of Gryffindors' that had a lot to think about.

"Hey, Harry? I've got a letter from Bill. He says that he believes he has what you asked for… What did you ask for?"

"Well, how to put this… Ron, have you ever heard of the legend about goat-milk and mummy-dust?"

"No. Not really."

"Oh good."

"You're making me worry…"

"So, Neville. What do you think of our new DADA professor?"

"Um, she's a bit… boring I guess."

"Well I think she's a downright nightmare!"

"I didn't ask you Ronald!"

"Well, I think she's great! She's helping me with my spelling, and explaining things about the world and all!"

"Harry, how many times do I have to tell you? You didn't make it up…"

Hermione's mind wandered back to the first lesson with the, in her own mind highly incompetent, teacher. It was months ago, but still a vivid memory.

"_Settle down class! I am Dolores Umbridge__, hired by the ministry to teach you all what you need to know to make it in today's society."_

_Well, it certainly was opened for interpretations, with that wording. I don't doubt her sincerity either… Hello sarcasm._

"_I shall begin class with a small message from the ministry. The fabled return of the dark lord is a lie, a mere dream, a nightmare, born from a worried little boy who couldn't possibly be held accountable for his actions. The only dark lord we have to worry about is the one left in our minds after the sudden end of dark lord Binns some few years past."_

_What is she babbling about? It's not making any sense! None._

"_And therefore will any mentioning of it being otherwise be punished most harshly."_

_Huh? Are you telling me that… Hermione never finished that thought._

"_It was all a dream? Well, that's a relief! I was really starting to wonder about my eternal future there for a bit. But if it's all in my head then it's alright I guess."_

"_Mr Potter, detention tonight at eight."_

"_Really? For who? Should I go and tell them?"_

_A few people snickered, and Hermione decided to stay out of it. It would be one of the few punishments Harry ever received after all. Even if this one happened to be undeserved…_

"_It won't be necessary Mr Potter; it is you who will be having detention."_

"_Because I have weird dreams?"_

"_That is correct."_

"_Hm, I guess it's only fair."_

Hermione returned to the present time when something Harry had said caught her attention.

"She helps you with your spelling?"

"Yeah, That was why I asked Bill for goat-milk. See here."

He showed her his hand, on which the words '_I shall eat pies.' _were written.

"I was supposed to write I will Not tell Lies, but I was a bit hungry, and I continued to spell things wrong. The problem is, professor Umbridge told me it only scars if you mean what you write, and since I was hungry…"

"I think I get it. And yet I don't, Harry what were you doing?"

"I was writing lines with a blood quill or something. I read up on this scaring and there is a legend about how to remove it in a way…"

"A blood quill? Aren't they illegal?"

"I wouldn't know… maybe she has special permission? Anyway, I've learnt how to spell imbecile during my detentions."

"Really?"

***

Dolores Umbridge was seated at her desk, surrounding her was a small army of moving and meowing kittens. They were of coarse only pictures, but she had always found it hard to leave them out when she decorated.

Unknown to most people it was Dolores mother that had bought her the first plate in her rather substantial collection. It had been a farewell gift for when she first left for Hogwarts. And now she had returned. As a good luck charm she had treated herself to a special five-set deluxe winter-kitten collection. She loved it dearly and awarded it a special place on her wall.

At the moment Dolores was looking for something she could pin that Potter boy for. She admitted that it was a tad childish to get revenge for the humiliation he and his friends put her trough during the first lesson, but she was working under orders after all, and now none of the students took her seriously. The incident on the quidditch field was the last drop. Her first reaction had been to suspend the two involved players, but then she had decided it was a bit harsh. She had decided to change her decision, and that decision in itself had led her to her current situation.

Looking through the last five years of Hogwarts quidditch related bills. At first she had just intended to get a quick glance in the bookshelf that was dedicated to quidditch in the staffroom, but then her eyes had fallen on the rather thick pile of already paid bills. For someone like her, who had decades of paperwork on her résumé, it didn't make sense. And papers which didn't make sense needed to be looked through.

What she had found had revolted her. It would seem as if the school had bought, not only a fair few new brooms (and that was understandable) but roughly four new Snitches every year!

A Snitch was the most expensive ball in the game; it was made of pure gold and silver for god's sake! And the school had spent thousands of galleons on the little critters the last few years. It was simply unreasonable. So she went and read through the rather extensive reports of the destruction of Snitches that was also to be found in the bookshelf.

Hours later she had started to take note of a disturbing reoccurrence. Another quick look in the shelf confirmed that she wasn't the only one connecting the dots, a small trophy for the highest destruction rate on captured Snitches in all eternity dedicated to one Harry Potter was located on the top shelf. Each and every one of the Snitches that had met its doom had been in contact with the Potter boy only moments before.

Now here was a question. Could she in good conscious retract the punishment that was a bit harsh (a lifelong ban on quidditch) all the while knowing it would cost the school another few hundred galleons? And what if he somehow got a job as a professional player? Where they aware of that the ministry paid for all English teams' equipment? In just a few years England could be ruined!

She could not. She would simply have to pretend as if he deserved it. If anyone else found out what she had, then it would be their decision of what to make of it all. At least she wouldn't be blamed for the future downfall of England's economy.

As she started to get ready for the night her thought on the tragic boy-who-lived occupied her thought yet again. For some strange reason he refused to write with anything other than the blood quill, claiming that the blood was prettier than the ink, and he had the scars to prove it. And then it was his inability to follow instructions. How hard was it to write a few lines? She had only kept him there for ten minutes for goodness sake! Oh well, she had better write a convincing explanation to the minister. Tomorrow.

***

A few moths later, at the end of the year feast.

The minister of Magic was at Hogwarts. Why? Well, only days before several students had been found inside the ministry, and so had Voldemort (Who had been surprisingly short.). Needless so say, he felt that the students deserved an explanation. And it would be best if it came from someone they trusted.

So here he was, watching Dumbledore relay the main points of what had occurred to the student body, waiting for the meeting afterwards with the involved children.

"And so, it was found that the dark lord has indeed returned. May you all enjoy your dinner."

The headmaster didn't go to his seat, but chose to go immediately towards the appointed meeting in his office. There were students waiting after all.

Minister Fudge joined him at the doors.

"Perhaps a little less information would have been enough Dumbledore?"

"Children are curious Cornelius, give them too little and they give you mountains of trouble."

"I see, but still… did they have to know about my timely retreat?"

"Ah… ha ha ha, perhaps not. But it was my comic relief, to make them listen more."

Cornelius didn't reply, and before long they both entered the office they where headed for.

In five chairs the children sat waiting for them. Cornelius had thought that they might be a bit scared and nervous, waiting in the headmaster's office usually had that effect on students, but there they were; laughing lightly at some story one of them was telling and munching on some chocolate cookies.

"Then of course the ministry came again…"

"Harry stop! That can't be true, you should have been expelled the fourth time!"

"Children, we are ready to begin, if you would all calm down a bit."

Cornelius unfroze and took the last seat.

Perhaps it was better not knowing what they talked about, sometimes he found his ministry lacking and he always felt better when he ignored it.

"So tell me please, what happened, why were you at the ministry?"

"Harry dragged us there. Do you have to ask headmaster?"

"I did not! You didn't have to ride the spooky horses if you didn't want to, but no, you had to win the race! It didn't matter that poor little Harry should have won does it now."

"Oh get a grip Potter! You lost fair and square, you picked a bad horse."

"Perhaps if you started at the beginning."

"Of course professor."

"You see, the Weasley twins told Harry, after he had told them about some chambers of prophecies or whatever he dreamt of, that it was impossible to brake in. Harry then talked about it with Sirius, and they agreed it could be done."

"And then he tricked us into racing on the scary horses to the ministry, the winner would get to eat all they wanted on his bill."

"He told me I'd get my own green house."

"I'd get my own library."

"It was my idea."

"hear, hear. It's all Luna's fault. She is wicked you know. She told me I would get a rare disease if I tricked the others. Whatever that is…"

"Ah I see…"

"And then we got there, Harry pushed some buttons in an elevator and we stepped out in the hall of prophecies."

"There is no elevator that goes there!"

"There is now minister."

"We found all kinds of prophecies, and Harry thought it best if we destroyed all of them."

"May I ask why?"

"Oh, Luna doesn't believe in them, and one got my parents killed so…

they're really no good."

"Then the death eaters showed up…"

"I'm getting a headache…"

"Perhaps a lemon drop would do you good Cornelius?"


	11. Chapter 11

I don't own Harry Potter or the others…

The reset button.– Or, the rather sudden end.

The rain had stopped falling the night before. It was still moist in the forest around Hogwarts.

It was dark outside, the sun had set merely two hours ago, and the death-eaters that surrounded the old school had set up their camps. The dark lord had finally initiated his plans on bringing down the-boy-who-lived and attacked the school. No violence had been used so far, but the panicked students trapped in the school were planning to revolt. All they needed to do to gain their freedom was to hand over a crazy kid; many wondered why it hadn't been done yet. The professor had gathered everyone in the great hall to explain the situation.

"Is everyone present?" the headmaster asked in a sonorused voice. His four head of house exchanged a few words with their prefects, and three of them gave an affirmative.

McGonagall though, had turned white. She mouthed "Potter" to him and a feeling of dread filled the aged man as he looked over the group of people.

"Have anyone seen Harry Potter?"

Luna Lovegood, a Ravenclaw student cast a sonorous on herself and said over the crowd's mumblings;

"He said he was running away, to save himself. He left an hour ago. He promised to send us postcards from all the places he visits though."

"And he didn't bring me?! I'm his best friend!!"

_Ah, Ronald Weasley… that boy certainly knows his priorities._

"He said you didn't believe in his invisibility cloak, and probably wouldn't want to come."

Dumbledore silently cursed that day when he gave away the wrong cloak, who would have thought it would eventually lead to the poor boys death?

---

Outside, at the very same time, in the death-eaters main camp people in black robes had gathered to hear the words of their lord. Voldemort himself stood on a large podium he had transfigured earlier, preparing to make his final speech to the followers before they stormed the castle. He cast a final glance over the crowd and would have commenced with his speech, but something disturbing caught his eyes. To make up for his small stature he had made a very tall podium, which enabled him to see to the very back of the crowd.

And in the back, behind all of his followers who had their faces turned to him, a stranger was sneaking. With the pink sparkling cloak that covered the person from head to toe it would have been impossible to guess the identity of said person, but there was no doubt in Voldemort's mind who this was.

"Potter!" He screamed in rage.

It was a testament to his followers' belief in his complete loss of mind that they all stood up and started to cheer when he did this. It served only to anger him more.

He silently cast a crusio on one nondescript follower in the front row and shouted

"Sit!"

The crowd sat back in their places quickly. In the far back the not so mysterious cloaked figure was gone. Voldemort roared in rage, unknowingly strengthening his followers' belief further, their master had lost his mind.

---

Harry had realised as soon as his name was shouted by the dark lord, that the man had the same uncanny ability as the headmaster; to see through invisibility cloaks. He had panicked, and as the people around him started to cheer he dove in to the crowd, making his way forward quickly. Suddenly they all sat down again, and having lost his cloak in the mass he did the same. He managed to steal the empty seat in the front row, and was suddenly very glad for his earlier idea of dressing out as a death eater to scare Ronald before leaving, it was Halloween after all. True, he hadn't found Ron, but the costume proved useful.

---

Inside the school the Headmaster had called Luna forward, so that she could answer some questions, it seemed as if she was the one who knew most right now.

"You saw Harry leave then? Why didn't you stop him?"

Luna didn't have a chance to answer the question; Hermione had forced her way through the crowd and stepped up to the younger girl.

"Luna, Harry can't die here! He sent himself a memory from the future, he was older then."

"Not everything is as it seems Hermione, you should know that."

"Please Miss Lovegood, answer my question, we have to save Mr Potter."

"You mean the memory wasn't from the future?"

"That is what I mean Hermione."

"Miss Lovegood…"

"Not now headmaster, I have to explain some thing to Hermione before time is up, you don't have to know. Beside, you can't save Harry from himself."

"But…"

"Is it because of that ritual? It was pointless!"

"But it will send your memories back if you are for some reason forcibly sent back in time."

"Luna, can you please start at the beginning."

By now the Headmaster had decided to stay silent, this was far to interesting to ignore. It seemed that the young Ravenclaw student had managed to get Hogwarts star student Hermione Granger to perform a very dark ritual at some point in time, but how? And Why?

"Harry haven't really received a memory from the future. I faked it. It's more fun that way."

"More fun…"

"It's impossible to send anything here from the future, because the future doesn't exist."

"Of course it does! Don't be ridiculous."

"Have you heard of any new prophecies in the last years? Any real ones?"

"As a matter of fact Miss Lovegood, the magical societies around the world have noticed a sudden decline in prophecies in recent years…"

"Thank you headmaster, and now Hermione, why do you think this is? Why aren't there anymore prophecies now? They have been common for the last thousand years."

"I haven't thought about it, but… How can you claim that…"

"Because of Harry. He put our world in a sort of limbo, and until someone can make him stop, it will stay that way."

"What are you saying Miss Lovegood?"

"I don't know why, but for some reason, as soon as Harry faces Voldemort in his sixth year the world starts over. I have tried to change things since it started, but it isn't working. Harry refuses to do the ritual, so he doesn't believe me."

"Well, it did involve hours of work with a pensive, you know he hates them."

"I do. But time is almost up, next time you'll remember things as well, and maybe we can change things."

"But why does it go wrong? I mean, why does it start over? The world I mean."

"I have a theory, that it might be the buttons. Their magic is very… unusual."

"You don't say…"

"It doesn't like hurting things. Did you see what happened when he aimed the spell at himself?"

"Yeah, a bit unreal if you ask me, immortality button… and he didn't want to use it until he won since it was like cheating…"

"Well, have you ever played a game where your character is immortal? It isn't much fun."

Luna would have gone ahead and explained her theory, and how she thought that they could break the cycle, but time was up.

---

Some minutes earlier, outside.

Voldemort intended to make his minions to search the area, but was yet again interrupted before he had a chance to begin. This time by someone who appeared to be a death eater.

"Oh my god! You're Voldemorts mini-me!"

Several people tried in vain to keep in their laughter. The death eater who had apparently yet to be clued in on their lord's misfortunate height-issues pulled of his mask.

Voldemort, who had pulled out his wand with the intention of killing the idiot, gaped in shock. There was the one and only, Harry Potter.

The boy, who had planned his revenge for quite a while (he thought that since it had been prophesised he'd better comply.), quickly cast his button-spell at the dark lord. It hit.

And nothing happened. Voldemort had been surprised when the spell went right through his hastily put up shield, but after having been hit he only felt a strange tingling on his neck.

He reached up with his empty hand, and felt what could only be a button.

Had he been able to see it, he might also have seen the tiny message that was inscribed.

'Reset Button – use only in emergencies.'

But he did not, and underestimating how easy it would be to activate he moved a finger over its' surface. The button was pushed, and everything was dissolved in a pretty sparkling show, flying everywhere.

One Tom Riddle was born moments after, with no memories of his earlier life. A strange button was still at the child's neck, waiting to be recharged.

For it was not one Harry Potters fault that time had been set into limbo. Not entirely at least, they were after all equals.

**The End.**


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